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My fiance got pissed at me because I talked to his ex...

My fiance got really pissed at me for talking to his ex who is also the mother of his son. She is the one who first approached me messaging me on friendster saying this: "hello there...I am reaching out to you if you need someone to talk to...I know ricky (my fiance)...I am the mother of his son...I found out what happened between you guys...I know you don't know me but I do know ricky very well..." blah blah blah then it ends saying "If you need to talk about ricky or your baby which will be my son's half brother or sister feel free to call me..." and she gives me her number. I know that she still has feelings for my fiance and I see what she is trying to do, and I really don't care but I just decided to text her for the fun of it and was also a bit interested in what she has to say. I am not the type to cause drama or anything like that so I don't see why my fiance would get so pissed. Am I wrong to have texted her?

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Asked by youngmom3525 at 11:16 AM on May. 1, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (10)
  • Nah. You might as well be friendly. Do you take care of her kid at all?

    Answer by ajguinn at 11:19 AM on May. 1, 2009

  • She's an ex for a reason, n if doesn't have a good realtionship with her maybe he doesn't want anything to do with her except their son. OR he might not want you to get close to her because he still has feelings! but I'd go with the first one! GL

    Answer by rebel07 at 11:20 AM on May. 1, 2009

  • Umm I guess if my hubby texted my ex.. I would be a bit confused on the motives. Obviously it bothered him. So obviously you were wrong. How did he find out? By reading your text messages and finding it? OR did you tell him- hey I talked to your ex. I think you should have been upfront with him. Telling him that she sent you a message and such. Figure out WHY he got mad. Did he get mad cause you were being sneaky or was he hiding something? Talk to him about it. I think its weird that he is the father to her child adn yours and you haven't had contact with her before this though. Is he not a father to their child?

    Answer by amy31308 at 11:20 AM on May. 1, 2009

  • Your fiance doesnt want you digging his past up .WHo know what bad stuff he did or she did and maybe he is ashamed of it .Or he knows she is crazy and want you away from that drama.Ex's should not be friends nothing good can come from especially if there are feeling's .If you want to confront her dont do it over text .Go out on a lunch and talk face to face and ask her staight if there is some thing that she feels she should tell who knows maybe she will throw you a warning about your fiance you dont know .But do you really want to know is the question Do you really want to dig up his past Do you think that will your relationship better

    Answer by hush84 at 11:23 AM on May. 1, 2009

  • you guys should be on speaking terms when it is about y'alls children & that is it. She may be a whack job, or SO might be scared that she'll tell you things about him that you probably don't want to hear. I would not talk to her YET. Take some time to establish your relationship first. Let him tell you about her & her ways before you get involved with her.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 11:30 AM on May. 1, 2009

  • I am not trying to dig up his past because I already know I shouldn't trust her, she could be telling me lies who knows because she does still have feelings for him. I just texted her out of curiosity to see what she has to say. My fiance found out I texted her because I told him, he knew she messaged me on friendster and then he asked me if I ever replied and then I told him I texted her. He told me he's pissed because he doesn't want any drama between babymamas but that isn't my intention, never will I start drama and if she tries to start it I won't go thru with it I just won't say anything so I don't see why he'd get so pissed.

    Answer by youngmom3525 at 11:35 AM on May. 1, 2009

  • I guess I can understand. I mean not wanting drama between the both of you when kids are involved. Drama will start eventually, and at all points should be avoided. I understand that you have to deal w/ her because they have a child together, but really, I think its still best that you only speak w/ her when she is picking up/dropping of her son for visit w/ his dad. I wouldn't get to chummy w/ her. It will only go down hill.

    Answer by Tiffany237 at 11:51 AM on May. 1, 2009

  • just like that woman knows your fiance, he knows her so maybe he has his reasons to want you not to get too friendly with her so you should respect that. i would thank her for her concern and support and tell her that if i had any issues i would talk to my man about them. that will let her know that you are committed to him and your relationship and you respect him. besides, her thinking she knows what is going on in my relationship would piss me off! the nerve...

    Answer by nairda at 12:10 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • because he is afraid she will tell you things...things he doesnt want you to know!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:40 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • you were not wrong. Anon is right, he knows she can tell you his secrets

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:42 PM on May. 1, 2009

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