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Should I call it quits?

My husband and I have been having some real issues. He isnt happy with the fact that I havent had a job since I was layed off in december. I am trying to get a job. I have applications in everywhere . There are just NO JOBS where we live. He says I bi*ch all the time. I only say how I wish he would spend more time with our son, because he is always working on his truck or at his friends house. We are 23 and just recently got married. To me being married is about spending time with each other and spending time as a family. I understand wanting to do things with your friends. But not 24/7. He thinks we should just be apart for awhile. But i feel like that giving up on what we have. What do I do?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:55 PM on May. 1, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • You guys got married and made a child together. You owe it to each other and to your child to make it work.
    kemclaughlin

    Answer by kemclaughlin at 3:57 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • Do you love him? Seems early to throw in the towel if when you married him, he was the one for certain. Get some counseling, meet half way, do things together. Did he do this before you got married? Tell him marriages don't just work, they is a shit load of effort put into them to make them work and he needs to decide what his priorities are; family or friends. If he can't fix this or has no desire to, then I'd leave him.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 3:59 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • I recently went through the same thing.
    I went to my mothers house for a few days and it made things better. I am 21 and been married for 4 years in november.
    I dont say call it quits if you love him and believes he loves you hang in there.
    Sometimes getting a way for a few days helps.
    He probably just wants to have fun hes young but yes when youre married you suppose to be with you family not 24/7 but it is required that he spends time with you and yalls child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:59 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • ask him what his definition of marriage is. Maybe that's just the problem. Talk about your ideas and what you want from the marriage. Get his then compromise. If that doesn't work then just ask him what he thinks can fix this or you are leaving. Maybe then he'll see how important this is to you
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:03 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • If he is the one bringing in the money, then you need to be understanding. You are right there are no jobs out there, therefore he probably has to work twice as hard to maintain a home and feed 3 mouths. My best friend had the exact same problem and now she is divorced and with 3 kids. You can not force a man to spend time with their child, work and get side jobs if the situation is tight. There will be sacrifices and obviously he is the one making the biggest sacrifice of all. Not spending time with his child. Talk to him, don't nag him. men hate that. Being at home is also a job. Cooking,cleaning, and raising a child is hard. If you stop the nagging, he will come around on his own. I will say that throwing in the towel is not a right choice. Marriage is hard work and lots of communication. Tell him how you feel but do not forget to ask him how he feels. Good luck to you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:07 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • You have a child to consider. It's NOT ALL ABOUT YOU!

    Think of your baby ~ a baby deserves to grow up with two parents.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:13 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • He's probably just stressed out and pissed off. If I were you, I would give him a break, unless you want him to blow up. He needs things to distract him from having to be the sole provider.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:52 PM on May. 1, 2009

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