Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

how often?

After my first pregnancy my sex drive went from 10 to 2-3, now four yrs later when we wanted to get preggo again, my husband said that I used him just to get pregnant. Because we didn't do it that often. But, he would sit down and watch tv, do his things, and I would end up cleaning after him and our 4 yr-old boy. I was pretty tired, and I work part-time too.... Well, during this pregnancy he wants it very often, but I don't feel in the mood. Am I pushing him away? Should I do it, even if I don't feel like it? He gets offended when I don't want any..... Am I normal??? HELP!!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:10 PM on May. 1, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Pregnancy does weird things to our bodies doesn't it? How far along are you? i think we are all different, my first trimester I really didn't want anything to do with my husband, but I did put out...for him :). My second trimester, forget it he didn't even have to ask for me to jump on him, I was more than willing! No I am 30 weeks and feeling exhausted again and not very good about how I look so I am pushing myself a little harder to be intimate with him, not because I don't have the desire to be intimate but just because I feel myself just getting more tired. I work, and we have 3 other children that are in baseball/softball and we do those activities with them 6 days a week, by the time it's all over I just want to sleep!

    Answer by LuvmyFam6 at 4:17 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • It's not abnormal.
    I'm in a similar position - DH wants it all the time, but I don't. I know that he needs it, though, so I try to give it to him at least once a week, even if I'm not in the mood.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • you are TOTALLY normal. women need to be relaxed, worked up to be putting in the mood. my dh used to say the same thing. even though i was cooking, cleaning, taking care of our son, and even after we finallly put him to bed i still was cleaning, even after my dh. so you're totally normal. you need to tell him that you need "me" time. dh and i figured out that if he takes care of the kids every once in a while, letting me go out and have me time or out with the girls, and i did the same for him, we argued less, and our sex life went back up. sit with him and talk with him about it, comunication always works. oh and don't forget to mention that he needs to clean up after himself too!

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:21 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • I want it all the time and he does not. I have learned to live with it. He is wonderful and when we do have it it is FANTASTIC! So I take it when I can get it.

    Answer by dillonsma at 6:00 PM on May. 1, 2009

  • IT's all about give and take.. We all pay our dues. Their might have been times during ovulation that he really didn't want to do it ( alot of time it feels too planned) but he did it.. right? With that said. There is no reason why you should always do it when you don't want to.. just compromise.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:01 PM on May. 1, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.