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If a person will not forgive you?

I am working hard on forgiving and repairing an important relationship. I asked the other person if we can move on, however she does not want to talk or take care of the original problem. I am tired of fighting but if she is not willing how do I make peace with myself? I asked her to sit and talk with me, but she will not.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:50 PM on May. 2, 2009 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (11)
  • Know that you have tried. You have given it your best effort. Now let it go.

    Answer by amy31308 at 12:53 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • I am in the same situation as we speak. Just forgive them and be patient for their forgiveness. God bless.


    Answer by mo2a27 at 12:53 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • Remember that forgiveness isn't about the other person. Forgiveness is about you. YOU Forgive to make peace with yourself and acknowledge the "mess up". We cannot control whether someone forgives us or not, all we can do is hope that one day they will. If she's not ready, then it's time to step back and give her some time.

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 12:54 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • It is easier said than done. MO, I will send you a pm later if you do not mind talking to me. I have a few things to do right now.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:54 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • Nothing you can do. You can only control your own actions.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:55 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • ive been old ex. young dumb and blah blah. honestly, if you work hard on being a better person then they will have to live with their own anger. its not healthy to dwell on something you have no control over. i prayed for forgiveness...and worked so hard on being a better person and realizing why what i did was so wrong. after that...i prayed he would find some solice in my apology and left it at that. any malcontent they feel afterward is their own problem. opening the door is the first and best step. good for you for doing that!! one day she will realize that she too needs to find some of that comfort and forgiveness. hope it works out!

    Answer by FoxyRoxyMommy at 12:56 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • I don't think you can (or should try) to push her to forgive you. If she is going to it will only happen over time & as whatever was damaged in your relationship begins to heal naturally (if she is open to it). It's painful when someone rejects us but, I think the best thing you can if you want her to come around is respect her wishes and boudaries. Forgiveness has to be on her terms, if you can surrender yourself to that your relationship may have a chance. I hope it works out.


    Answer by BubbaLuva at 12:57 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • There are a lot of really good post on here. ITA, you have done what you can to repair the rift. You are the one who rised above the discord. YOU have repaired it on your end. YOU have done your part. Now it is on the other person to reach out. Don't dwell on it. Set it out to the universe or to your God and let it go. Your part in the matter is finished. Let it comfort you that you have done all you can. If the other person can not forgive then they are the ones who will have to deal with anger not you.

    Answer by pnwmom at 1:27 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • You have given it a shot OP... you offered an olive branch (per-say) and this person would not take it. Now you need to find it in you to let it go. If you have forgiven what has happen then allow this person time to do the same and when/if the time comes and this person wants to reconnect with you, you will be there waiting...

    Good Luck

    Answer by gmasboy at 1:59 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • Just leave her with an open invitation to regain your friendship and let it go.

    If she wants to maintain anger over it, then that is her burden to bear.

    Answer by mogencreative at 2:46 PM on May. 2, 2009

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