Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Does anyone know if you can get sole custody of your kids if the x is hardly ever around?

the x is an over the road truck driver and our kids only see him when he rolls into town which is like when holidays show up like mothers day and easter ect.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:57 PM on May. 2, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (15)
  • I don't know (sorry I know that's not helpful) but I am in almost the same situation so I would love to know also.
    Mudfishzgirl

    Answer by Mudfishzgirl at 8:01 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • no harm in trying
    you can file and if he fights it then you fight about that issue, if he doesnt then no prob :)
    my sons father didnt fight, but then again he does not see him at all we went to the court mediator sighned the papers and it was done
    mommymeg03

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 9:32 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • All states and counties have different laws so you'll have to find out from where you live and more than likely you won't know 'til you go to court. Good luck.
    Bethe333

    Answer by Bethe333 at 9:36 PM on May. 2, 2009

  • Ask him but realize that you will loose child support if he does sign over his rights. This was okay with me. I said you dont show up anyway and youre a problem when you do so sign them over and you can stop having the attorney general hassle you. He did. No regrets.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:17 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • sighning over rights and full custody are 2 diff things
    i have full custody and he has to pay childsupport
    sighning over rights is sighning over all parental rights as if they are no longer the legal parent they can be adopted by your so ect that is when you loose child support, not with full custody
    mommymeg03

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 7:06 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • I have sole legal custody of my oldest with his father getting visitation. You can file the paper work with the courts on the ground that it is your children's best interest that you are the sole legal custodial parent (meaning you make all the decsions about education, religion, medical care ect) and the he have visitation.

    You will not loose child support if you file for sole custody. I still recieve CS. As the PP said, that would only happen if you asked him or the court ordered him to sign over all parental rights whatsoever
    mom2AJandDamien

    Answer by mom2AJandDamien at 7:41 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • You can try for sole custody at anytime. If the father is not available to make joint decisions about the children then that should work in your favor. He would still have visitation rights of course. If you are not wanting him to have visitation then you would have to get him to sign away his rights or to prove abandonement by him. Check and see if your area has a free legal aid group...they can answer questions and even help you fill out the paper work.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:20 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • i am going through something simular and fighting to get my x out completely. you will have to get an attorney for sure and some do free consolations. you will have to ask them on how you can go about this. it will be a fight for sure. but being he is gone for is job they may not do anything but i dont know for sure. i see how your feeling cuz this hurts the kids and it is so sad how these fathers think they can come and go when ever they want and get away with it. my kids want nothing to do with their father any more cuz of all the hurt he has caused them. i wish you alot of luck momma.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:34 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • I wish instead of people asking custody questions on cafemom they would go to a real souce, like legal aid or the clerk of courts. AHHHHH so much mis information it makes me mad. Go to your county court website, most (not all) counties) will have all the paperwork you need to file for custody. You don't need any attorney unless he contests and it gets nasty. MOST states (I know for sure in Colorado cause that's where I am) WILL NOT just allow a father, or mother for that matter to terminate parental rights unless there is a step parent waiting to adopt. Now that is different if the child is in states custody. And proving abandonment is REALLY hard. Please check with someone at your county courthouse, most have a self help area, where you can go and ask questions. I have sole legal custody, decision making, everything. I DO NOT CS but that's because her father is a moron and won't cooperate.
    lovemybabygirl7

    Answer by lovemybabygirl7 at 9:22 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • cont.
    He didn't make any effort with the custody case. never even responded that he got the paperwork and it went forward anyways. I made every attempt, copies of everything I sent him. Judges don't look to kindly on fathers who don't particiapte with their children. Good luck.
    lovemybabygirl7

    Answer by lovemybabygirl7 at 9:23 AM on May. 3, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.