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My husband and his father whom he hasnt seen in 17 years.

My dh out of nowhere says that he wants to look up his real dad who he hasnt seen in 17 years. His dad always treated him badly and never cared about him or any of his brothers. So , their mother moved away and he never wanted anything to do with them. Now he wants to find him. Yesterday, I was looking on the internet, and payed money to find his last known address. Now I don't know whether to tell him or not. What if he calls his dad and hes still the same horrible guy. What should I do?

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:15 AM on May. 3, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • if he wants to see his father let him...

    Answer by Mrs.Owen86 at 9:17 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • ive been there. i had to find my real parents after 15 years just to see IF they had changed and they had. maybe theres a reason. talk to him about it

    Answer by jessicamarieh at 9:21 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • Just tell him the truth, he was not a father than and will not be a father now. What if the men got worse? Talk about your fears. But if he wants to see him than let him. He will need a lot of support all those bad feelings will come back.

    Answer by gammie at 9:26 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • Support him in his decision! Don't hide what you found because it may bite you in the end.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:30 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • i would talk to him about ur feelings and then if he says it wont bother him than the next day say u found him lol

    Answer by lienna at 3:27 PM on May. 3, 2009

  • Even though you are his wife, this is one thing that you just need to be 110% supportive of him in, its not your place to keep info from him, if he wants to find his dad then let him, if his dad hasnt changed than you just have to be there to comfort him afterwards but like I said as far as not tell him what you found, you do not want him to be angry and upset with you even though you were just trying to protect him

    Answer by hautemama83 at 6:29 PM on May. 3, 2009

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