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Is it normal to stop talking to your parents once you become a parent yourself?

My son is sick, we are having trouble with our insurance, so I broke down and called my mom crying one day. She said what a downer I was and I should get on drugs to make me happy and not to call her crying. I am usually a very happy person and don't talk about bad things, it's just not me to do that. Just this past week with my son has been a lot and I thought I had my mom to talk to, but I guess I was very wrong. Is it normal to stop talking to your parents once you become a parent yourself?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:38 AM on May. 3, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (15)
  • I don't think so. I call my parents at least once a day, if not more! They live in FL and I'm in NY so it's nice to talk to them everyday. Plus every week we put our 8-month-old son on the webcam so they are able to see him and he can see them. I'm sorry you didn't get much support from your mom. Maybe she's having a bad week too?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:46 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • I dont think it is at all. I talk to my mother daily! Weather I am happy, sad, pissed, and I dont think she would ever NOT want to to call her. I am not sure even what advice to give. Maybe ask her, why are you being so distant, and why do I feel I cant come and talk to you. Sorry maw! Take care =]
    jpage

    Answer by jpage at 10:47 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • It's not normal. I call my Mom when I have a problem - she helps me through it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:52 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • I too don't think it's normal, BUT I no longer speak to my mother due to a number of other reasons! It really is sad that at the point in our lives we should be "friends," we are not. I admit I am very jealous of what other grown daughters have with their mothers (I'm an only child, and I never knew my father), but I have come to the realization that life is to short to force a relationship that wasn't meant to be and causes only strife, and instead prefer to focus on my little corner of the world with my rock of a husband, and our two boys (both of whom have special needs!) :o)
    LoriKeet

    Answer by LoriKeet at 10:52 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • Life gets busy; I have to make time to call my Dad.

    ShutterbugMama

    Answer by ShutterbugMama at 11:05 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • That is ridiculous! I don't talk to my mother a lot because she doesn't have a home phone or a cell, but she calls me when she can from her work and I can tell her my problems and she listens and makes me feel better. I actually talk to my MIL a lot more than my mother just because of the availablity. I think it's incredibly insensitive of your mother to treat you that way. She never called her mother when she was having a bad day crying? If she always does this, I would just bypass her and call a good friend who won't mind you "crying on her shoulder" Good luck!
    tangleballlover

    Answer by tangleballlover at 11:06 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • LoriKeet I used to be jealous of what other moms have with their moms too until I finally grew enough to know my value as a human with out my mother. i was blessed with a most incredible mother in law who mothered me more in 16 years than my mother has in 55 years. op you don't need your mother to be a mother yourself. you need nurturing from women or caring men for some guidance sometimes to mother. Deep in side of you when you look in the miriror in to your own eyes, looking straight into your own eyes do you see your accomplishments? If not seek counseling to guide you into being you successfully with a mom who's difficult.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:07 AM on May. 3, 2009

  • Me personally have became closer with my mother since I had a child, but my mom is not as sensitive to my needs whether it is bills or sickness just for the simple fact that I am my own responsibility now.
    Blueberryplz

    Answer by Blueberryplz at 12:29 PM on May. 3, 2009

  • OP. the older I have gotten the more I have realized that my mother was not normal or good in her parenting and that it would be smart, normal, and good if we grew apart because it means I am becoming a different and better person/parent for my kid(s). in many circumstances it IS normal not to talk to your parents.
    MythicMMM

    Answer by MythicMMM at 1:10 PM on May. 3, 2009

  • I talk to mine more now that I am a parent. We seem to have more to talk about.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 1:21 PM on May. 3, 2009

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