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am i to much of a nag

ok i feel like im nagging to much
hey my hobby morks for boilermakers( he is gone for weeks sometimes months at a time) and he works 7 days a week i know his job is hard but when he does get a day of ( when hes in a different state that what we live in ) he goes out with the guys at work and the go to the fun... im not mad that he does this but i guess i get jealous b/c i am with our 2 kids 24/7 im a stay at home mom and i dont know anyone in the town in other then his family so when we gets to go out i get sorta depresses i guess b/c im at home by my self with 2 little one and hes like go make some freinds and go out which would be fine but it kinda pisses me off that he gets to go have fun and never once has to see if someone can watch our 2 kids b/c if i wanted to go out that what i would have to do sorry that this is confuseing but am i being a nag or would you feel the same and any advice

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:35 PM on May. 3, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (6)
  • hell yeah id be flipping out too! thats not fair. i understand he works, but they are his two kids too! this aint the 50's!!!
    LA09TKP

    Answer by LA09TKP at 11:45 PM on May. 3, 2009

  • Well the only advantage here is that you get to have your kids with you all of the time. Alot mom's would love to trade places with you. The only thing I don't care for is your husband is away all or most of the time that would suck for me, I wouldn't like that especially if he is out of town and spend his days off with his friends oh no mam. You should just start doing something out side with the kids just don't be at home so much it will drive you crazy and you need to talk to your husband about what you are feeling he is being selfish doing this I once knew a guy who was divorced and had 2 kids from this woman then they moved away causing this guy to drive 5 hours away (10 hours back and forth :(....) but he wanted to see his kids so sometimes you just have to sacrifice some things in life, there are not that many men like that, You better say something or somethings gotta give. GL But you are in the right on this.
    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 11:59 PM on May. 3, 2009

  • Well, I can understand your resentment. My hubby works Mon-Fri, and on he weekends he likes to go skiiing or hiking ect. Stuff you can't do with the kids so I am home 24/7 like you, and no babysitters available either, UGH!!! But the way I see it is that the reason I'm home is because he works hard to make it that way, and if once in awhile he gets to go out and have a blast then GOOD FOR HIM. I use to get mad, but realized that my resentment was no good for me, my kids or especially my marriage. I love him, so I should be happy for him, not jealous, happy that my hard working hubby gets to go out on a saturday here and there. I learned that the thing about loving someone is learning to want more for them than for yourself, and now I pratically shove him out the door to go fishing. He's not one to watch the kids either, so I get creative and have found other ways to get my own R&R.
    puddleybug

    Answer by puddleybug at 1:54 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • yeah i let my ex go and have fun with his friends, i worked nights and he worked days, keep the bed cold, and he will find someone to warm it up, it worked the first 2 yrs, as child care was to expensive, while the cats away the mice will play....................
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:22 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • I'm a military wife and my dh deploys. I'm also a SAHM (though my kids are older now). I do understand where you're coming from, and it is normal. But, on the flip side of it, think of all the things you get that he doesn't. Depending on the age of your kids, he's missing first steps, first tooth, first words, first day of school, etc. Maybe, he's also feeling jealous of you, because you get to be home and experience these things?

    I would strongly suggest that you make an effort to get to know some other people where you are - join a Mom and Me playgroup, go to the Y, whatever. You can swap child care with other moms and get a break, go out with other moms, etc. Being a SAHM does NOT mean that you can't get a break. You also need a chance to be able to have down time to de-stress and have some "you time".

    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 5:29 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • I was a SAHM (my kids are now adults). My hubby traveled for his work (diesel mechanic),he would be gone for 4-6 weeks at a time, come home for a weekend (just long enough for me to do his laundry) and then be off again. I know how hard this can be, but all I can say is get over yourself!!
    You need to start finding things outside of your home to get involved in. You may not like the way things are right now, but I can promise you that your children will thank you for it later.
    Don't worry about your husband getting to have a boys night out.!
    Nanna22

    Answer by Nanna22 at 9:57 AM on May. 4, 2009

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