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How can I help my son with ADHD?

At the moment, I am at a loss. I have talked to his doctors and they are no help at all. My son was diagnosed with debilitating ADHD and High Functioning Autism. He will be starting school in the fall but I am concerned about his speech and his understanding of anything I am saying. He is currently taking Clonidine to calm him down (after we have tried several other medications) and I want so desperately for him to be ready. He also has started speech therapy but it doesn't seem to be helping.

I have sat him down and read to him, taught him his colors, shapes, and numbers, and even attempted to teach him to write but everything seems to be gone the moment we end the lesson. It's almost like he's not retaining any of the information he's been taught. I'm afraid that he will struggle through school to the point of hating it and I want him to be comfortable when he goes. Any advice would be appreciated!


Asked by Anonymous at 2:23 AM on May. 4, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

This question is closed.
Answers (22)
  • First of all, make sure you keep the focus of what really is important. Your child feeling loved. School is good and fine, but will do him very little good if he finds that it is full of pressure and self-esteem blasters.

    I have 2 ADHD boys now 19 and 21. I often had to check myself. We all want our children to do great and to succeed, but I can not stress that FEELING LOVED IS MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL.

    Go to your schools councelor & Principal. By law they have to set up a plan for your son with a disability that will help him to succeed. (ex. Where other kids do 50 problems, he will do 10 as long as he can show he knows it) stuff like that.

    KEEP A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS TEACHER. This will make all the difference in the world. Don't be one of those moms that find fault with everything the teacher does, meet her, laugh with her, work with her. Remember, she is human and doing the best with what she can.

    Answer by Bigalsgirl at 10:11 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • hang in there! it sounds like you are already doing so much to help him :) i would read some books on the subject. go online and google it. there are sooo many people out there going through similar situations. i hope you find what you need...

    Answer by nairda at 2:29 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • You just gotta keep doing what your doing, you need to remember autistic people retain information differently too. I used to work with autistic teens and toddlers you just gotta be repetitive and it can take a long time for them to retain the same thing that you have been going over everyday but it just takes patience

    Answer by Breezy1988 at 2:50 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • Breezy is so correct! I worked with autistics as well and you just have to repeat, repeat, repeat until you are numb! I can bet you that he has retained some of what you have done with him, his knowledge just hasnt been tapped by you or others when he is out and about. Maybe ask him his colors while at the grocery store looking at the fruits and veggies, or heck, ask him the colors of cars! That always worked for the boys I had. Your doing an awesome job preparing him to go to school!

    Answer by pinkcalla721 at 3:06 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • Continue with what you're doing, but find different ways to present the information. My oldest has provisional diagnoses of PDD-NOS and ADHD (he's 5). (they're calling them "rule out" diagnoses...waiting to see how he does in Kindergarten this coming school year for a couple of months)

    Anyway....he's a VISUAL learner. He can't retain anything if it's read to him, if it's presented in any way other than with pictures or demonstrations. He has to see how it works, how things go together and how things are used before he can retain the information. When he does retain it, watch out!!! (he has a higher than average IQ and works two years ahead of his age)

    I've also noticed he does better if he's had a chance to burn some energy, it kind of calms his mind. We have a mini trampoline ($25 at Walmart) and he does about an hour in the morning on that thing....he still has energy to burn! Cont...

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 6:16 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • cont...

    No, I don't make him do it, I just put the trampoline out and he goes to town. If I don't put it out, he stand in the middle of the room and jumps, runs in place, does jumping jacks, etc....

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 6:17 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • Not sure if this would help, but with both of my kids I never really "taught" them things like colors and shapes. As in sitting them down and teaching. What I did is I always always referred to somethings shape and color. And the amount. Like, can you hand me those two yellow circles? It worked great for colors, shapes and quantity. Unfortunately the one side effect was that ds could tell you how many things he had, but could not count out loud. He could also tell you what letters were what, and read simple words, but could not tell you his alphabet, so I honestly think it's him, not my method lol. Good luck, your son is lucky his momma is so on top of this.

    Answer by southernwldchld at 6:53 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • I think you are doing a better job than you give youself credit for.Im sure your doing everything right.I have two children with adhd and it is definitly a struggle everyday.My son dillon who is five has it the worst and it is very difficult to deal with i know.It seems as though when i try to teach him he is looking at me but his mind is going 100 miles an hour so he doesnt hear me.I have cried and asked why but i have come to accept that this is just the way my boys are.Dillon is in school now and they are already talking about putting him in iss because he disrupts the class.I wish that teachers would understand that they cant control it its not their fault.My son also had speech and devlopment classes and he really benifited from the one on one instruction.okay so enough about me.You are doing a great job hang in there.

    Answer by scprincess1416 at 6:55 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • Think of everything that you have already started with your son. Some people just assume that all of it is the responsibility of the school system. Speech therapy, from my personal experience, takes a while to work but it will. Everything that you are doing is what he needs and you are the best person that can do it because you are his mother. It is done because you love him. I can't imagine the amt of frustration that you have but keep going. You might already be doing this but make everything a game. His personality, like my older daughter and she is 15 now and still is somewhat like this, isn't going to do well with just sitting down and doing flashcards. Play ball with him, every time he tries to answer correctly like him throw,hit, etc the ball. Just an idea. He can use his abudant energy and practice his flashcards at the same time. Good luck!

    Answer by hsnurse at 7:45 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • My son is in 1st grade and has both Aspergers & ADHD. We have an IEP in place for him, and he also takes Ritilan, and Chlonindine (to help him sleep sometimes) and these combos seem to work well for him!
    It took trying several meds before we found the right ones for him. It was a tough road, and I hated it! But I am now relieved that we found what works for him. He is focused at school now, and even has a couple of friends!
    You can PM me if you want, and we can chat.

    Answer by sunnymom3 at 7:49 AM on May. 4, 2009