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im havin a miscarrage...what in the hell am i supposed to do???

on like 3 tuesdays ago i was told that i was havin twins...the following friday i was told i am pregnant with only one and that i have a subchorionic hemmorage. the baby had a heart beat of 96, which they said was low. well on my obgyn appt. on last monday i was told the sac had started to deflate and that there was no heartbeat..they gave me a pic. of the fetal pole. said dont give up hope. i balled my eyes out in the waiting room. they took blood. so i went to th er and had another ultrasound...again, i had blood taken, and another ultrasound...but no heart beat. so i when to a clinic, to have a better ultrasound...no heart beat...only this time...the couldnt even see the baby...nor could they see the yolk sac. i schedualed a d n c, and then calcelled it, deciding that i was just not ready to let go. and, the next day i started passing clots...im loosing the baby, how am i supposed to deal with this???

 
melissacoulter

Asked by melissacoulter at 5:19 AM on May. 4, 2009 in Pregnancy

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Answers (3)
  • So sorry hun and I know you do not want to hear that! You want a solution to fix this all and go back to the happy wishes of twins...I am SO SORRY! I have no idea what you are emotionally going through. All I have do is pray for you and your family. Like PP said these things sometimes just happen...you should seek out as much support within friends, family your hubby and professionally as you can to cope.

    Cry all you need mama...you are allowed to! *hugs* Take care.
    Bugsmommy1908

    Answer by Bugsmommy1908 at 6:45 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • I am sorry mama. You need to remember that it is NOT your fault. Sometimes these things do just happen and no one is to blame.

    There are some pregnancy loss groups on cafemom. You can get some support from other women who have been in your shoes, and those are great places to just go talk and cry/vent.

    I don't know where you go from here. I think you and your SO should talk, take all the time you need to grieve and realize that it's ok to be sad/hurt.

    Hugs. again, I am so sorry for your loss.
    celticreverie

    Answer by celticreverie at 5:40 AM on May. 4, 2009

  • I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. It's such a sad and hurtful thing to lose a baby. I've been there, too. I've lost 3 pregnancies at 6 weeks. Each time it hurt a little bit more and it took a little bit longer to feel like trying again afterwards.
    I suggest seeking support groups in your area. We went through our hospital and I met women who have gone through the same thing as me and it was nice to talk to others. My husband was sad, but he never quite fully understood why I was completely devastated.
    Don't worry mama, there will be a time where you will have a healthy baby again. *HUGS*
    bethany_smith

    Answer by bethany_smith at 7:56 AM on May. 4, 2009

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