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Potty training...desperate!!

My son is 2 and half and will not poop on the potty...He will pee but not poop. We have tried almost everything at this point and can not figure out how to get him going. Any advise would be GREATLY APPRECIATED?!!


Asked by meagen22 at 4:19 PM on May. 4, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (9)
  • I put a little potty in her room and as I tuck her in, I remind her that she can get out of bed and poop in the potty if she needs to. Two nights in a row now she has called me back in - she's pooped in her potty. So, we celebrate and go downstairs to thaw a slice of cake. But the pooping is on her terms, as she is ready to do it. For her, that seems to be the key for everything she does. If she wants to, she masters something quickly. If she's not interested or sees no reason, then she digs in her heels and won't. Sigh.

    When I decided to try this, I could see a couple of problems looming:
    (1) She might hold her poop so she can poop several times instead of just once - getting more cake. I put in a "any poop gets a sticker but only big poops get cake" rule right from the start.
    (2) What happens when the cake is gone... it's a big cake. Hopefully it won't be a problem but I'll warn her as we get close to the end.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 4:40 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • great i'm having the exact opposite problem, he'll poop in the potty but not pee...ugh. what i do with my son is when he looks like he's gotta go potty (he'll be holding his pull up and have this look on his face and i just know, also sometimes he'll come up to me and say "poopy" meaning he has too, he's in the process or he already went. if he hasn't gone yet, i rush that boy to the potty and have him sit there as long as possible for him to go, yes, sometimes it takes 20 minutes but isn't that normal for guys to take that long? :) lol...i just sing songs with him, read him a book, do colors, count, abc's, whatever it takes to take his mind off of what he's doing.

    now, how did you get him to pee in the potty???

    Answer by armywife43 at 4:27 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • It's actually common for kids to not want to poop. Reasons vary but the key to fixing it is to find HIS reason.
    Does he think the poop is part of him and he doesn't want it to go away?
    Does he not like the splash it makes in the water?
    Does he only poop standing up (or laying down)? If he won't squat to poop, sitting on the potty feels wrong.
    Is he just stubborn and wants to do it when he's ready?

    I tried everything with my daughter too. Sticker charts, stickers on her shirt, M&Ms, reading books about poop (Everyone Poops, Where's the Poop, Zoo Poo) but nothing worked. I know she can since she has but she simply won't. She waits until she's in a pullup for bedtime. I finally bought a big cake from CostCo and put it in the freezer. If she starts telling me "I allowed to poop in my pullup" I tell her that yes, she can, but she only gets cake if she poops in the potty.

    - cont -

    Answer by kaycee14 at 4:34 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • OMG that is so funny...To get him to pee we actually bought regular tighty whites and we started by letting him run around the house in those with no pants just the underware. As he peed in them he hated the feeling of being wet because they became cold and saggy. So we showed him the potty and explained if he did not want to be wet he had to pee pee in the potty. In addition to that 'we bought a bag of plastic boats at walmart (so i can clean them easy) and put them in his potty. We told him to "sink the ship"...LOL so he would aim at the boat and pee on it. It worked great. You could use anything I am sure to sink or aim at. On the poop note I have tried to put him on the potty when he was pushing or looked like pooping but he throws a fit (throwing his body everywhere). It seems like he is scared to let it fall in. I am at a lose I just don't know what else to do. But thank you very much for the advise!!!

    Answer by meagen22 at 4:38 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • I don't know that I have advice. I haven't done the traditional "potty training" per say. I try more of the child readiness approach rather than parent readiness approach. I find with my daughter (also 2 1/2) that when I allow her to tell me she is ready then "learing" is a breeze, if she is getting frustrated, it's usually a sign that she isn't ready for that step. There is something that's "uncomfortable" to her and she isn't going to learn.

    For my daughter we have always (since she was born) done Nakey Baby time, it's a special time for her to be her...she gets to run around totally naked for the better part of the evening. I know the "look" on her face when she needs to pee and poo, and I have 3 potties in my house she has always known to go there and try to do her business, or she would usually pee on a "chuck" or there were ocasional accidents, but those were rare.

    Answer by smilinghug at 4:48 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • Part 2: If you look at my journal posts you will see that my daughter herself just pooed in the potty for the first time last night. It will happen, it's just one of those things that they have to do on their own, I think if you try to force it, they will end up having a larger learning curve and then you end up with "accidents" in the underwear? That's just my opinion. It's whats working for me. I just talk to her about it, I don't try and come across as "leacturing" her, just talk. She always follows me into the bathroom when I am going and I tell her what I am doing, I show her my poop and tell her that mommy does it, daddy, does it, papa does it, everyone does it, it's okay to poo in the potty. She just finally felt comfortable enough with it yesterday for it to happen!! I wish you luck!

    Answer by smilinghug at 4:51 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • More than likely your son has developed an irrational fear of pooping on the potty or toilet.  This is very common at his age.  I have seen it many times as a nanny over the past 20 years.

    I have heard quite a lot of positive feedback from parents using the "poop refusal training" method?  If I were to try this, I would sit with my child in the bathroom and tell him that we were in it together for as long as it took, and then I'd wait.  Hopefully, you are able to recognize his cues when he is about to poop.  Here is a link:


    Answer by DeTora_Family at 6:23 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • my 10yr was potty trained at 3 during the day and used pull-ups until 6yr.
    my 6yr was fully trained at 4yr never needed pull-ups. every kid is different don't worry he won't go to college with diapers on. have him wear underwear if he poops make no big deal about it. just have him wash out the underwear and if he does poop in the toilet make a huge deal out of it stickers, high fives, hugs, and tell him your proud of him. make sure its not painful to him maybe he can use a stool softener- ask his doctor. he won't go int toilet if it hurts he may think the toilet is hurting him.

    Answer by maiahlynn at 11:48 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • You know he does have hard stools more often then regular stools. I am now wondering you might be right on with that answer. I can't believe I did not think of that. Thanks you.

    Answer by meagen22 at 7:08 AM on May. 5, 2009