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I have a friend that might be more.............

I have a 16 month old and a 2 1/2 year old. Their dad and I are getting a divorce. I have meet a really great guy, who is in the military and leaving in June. We have decided to wait until he gets back before we take our friendship any further, and he meets my kids (he doesn't have any kids, but he can't wait to meet mine). After he returns when is it ok for my kids to meet him? How should I go about it?

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Asked by momof285 at 8:29 PM on May. 4, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (5)
  • It might be better to wait for your kids to meet him until things start getting more serious between you two. It might be harder to break it off if the kids don't like him, but it'll be easier than the possibility of your relationship not going anywhere and another guy walking out of their lives.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:37 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • Take it slow. Make sure you are in it for the long run with him. Once things get serious maybe bring him around, but ONLY as a friend. Dont "date" him just yet in front of your kids until you see how they all get along. Then move from there. That way if something isnt going well, it will be a smooth transition for them...
    Dont let him come around constantly suddenly. Just on an occasion! Dont let your kids fall in love with him before you do! :)
    Good Luck!

    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 8:53 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • Also sometimes right before a deployment, men go through a need a relationship/get married real fast mind set. My husband is in the Army and you would be suprised how many soldiers get into serious relationships right before they deploy only to come back with a BIG change of heart. You are also going through a divorce. I would take it extremely slow and not introduce the kids till after he gets back and you have been seeing him for a while. Deployments change people.

    Answer by Soniam301 at 9:07 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • no don't let them meet until its serious WHAT IF IT DOESN'T WORK OUT your kids will be heart broken again( broken from divorce). divorce is hard enough on kids! finish the divorce, write your friend while he is gone, when he comes back if you insist he meet the kids tell them he is a friend
    honestly it will be hard on them to lose thier dad and him to. so think about waiting

    Answer by maiahlynn at 11:31 PM on May. 4, 2009

  • Develop your relationship with this person first before you get your kids involved. Make sure that this is someone that is going to stick around and be in your life. It's hard on kids to have people they care about come and go. I would discretely date without them knowing. Do you really want to get involved with somebody that is going to come and go a lot or be gone all of the time? Maybe you should just remain friends and don't be so quick to rebound, there are plenty fish in the sea:) I know it feels good to feel wanted and good about somebody again but take your time to date.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:28 AM on May. 5, 2009

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