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To all the mothers that have not-so-great relationships with their own mothers...

Why are you NOT ashamed to come onto a public website and speak negatively about her. I mean no matter what, she is still your mother and you would not be here today if it weren't for her. I know what it is like to not have the ideal mother daughter relationship-I have been there too with my own mother but over time I grew up and realized that she did her very best with me and even if she hadn't I will still respect her as my mother no matter what. Anyway, our relationship has done a total 180 and it took years for us to get to this point. I mean I know that this website is to get support and understanding from other mothers and if you feel like you must vent about your mother then at least be anonymous about it. What if your relationship changes or God-forbid something worse happens. Would you want to look back and see all the horrible things that you said about her in a very public place for the world to see?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:46 AM on May. 5, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (29)
  • mother in laws a different story
    niceandspice

    Answer by niceandspice at 6:48 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • get over it. people are going to do stuff throughout your entire life you dont agree with. and they wont change it just because you made a post about it on cafemom..

    my advice. let it go and move on with yourself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:48 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • Hi. I'm confused. Why do you think every mother is like yours? Every person has their own personality made by who's ever creator and shaped by things in their life. My mother decided and practices her decision to not nurture me as a kid and in addition to not want to be around her grandchildren. She has been invited and also we've offered to go to her when her calendar's clear spontaneously because of obligations more than playing bridge of movie night on our end. Finally I've told my kids that they are loved by her but she loves herself more, they're good great kids but grandma's friends help her more easy than we can. Blood relation doesn't mean a man is a good father and it doesn't mean a woman is a good mother. Society forms each and every one of us no matter who is around us.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:54 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • OP Here- Anon 2:48 Please refer to the journal post entitled, "Why Is It So Cool to Be a "Bitch" ? I am pretty sure that she was referring to people just like you. And I guess my making a post about it because I don't agree with it is the equivalent to you coming to my post and reading AND leaving your two-cents thinking that you would change me...why? because obviously, you don't agree with my question. Maybe you should get over yourself. Don't take your misery out on me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:55 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • would you rather people keep true feelings bottled up and then god forbid if something happened you couldnt cope at all with it cause you dealt with all the mama drama alone all those years?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:56 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • sorry and I'm confused what a person's screen name has to do with venting about their mother? I'm not sure that each of us knows every one's real screen name and life history behind them to watch out for some one else's mother? I've actually seen more women here in good relationshps with their mom than non existent relationships with them. I am glad your relationship has worked out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:59 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • OP Here- Anon 2:54, Yes I realize that all mothers are not like mine, (which is why she is special) but they are still your mother. I guess I just don't see anything that justifies disrespecting your own mother to the point that you would degrade in such a public way. If it something that you feel like you must do or that it is justified by her actions toward you then why not at least do it in private. We are all mothers here so explain to me, at what point do feel that it would be okay for your children to humiliate you publically for all the world to see because contrary to what you may believe, life happens and becoming what would be considered a bad mother can happen to the best of us in a heart beat. How would you want your children to treat you?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:02 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • OP Here Again- ANON 2:59, Oh Please lets not pretend like a LOT of these screennames aren't also accompanied by public profiles with all sorts of family pictures. That is all that you need for the right person to come across and know all of your business. If you think that this site is private than you are very naive. Unless you make your page and all of your pictures private, which NOT EVERYONE does.

    And to the person that said that I am a Moron: I guess if thinking that all parents deserve to be respected makes me a moron than you're right and I will gladly except that title.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:08 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • why do you ask the question if you are not going to accept the answers?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:09 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • *accept* not except
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:09 AM on May. 5, 2009

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