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I don't know who my father is, and I can't ask my mother who he is because she pasted away.

My question is... Has anyone else gone through anything similar?


Asked by lara_b at 9:53 AM on May. 5, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • Maybe it may not be a good thing for you to meet your father.If the relatives are not willing to tell you who he could be, he may not be a good guy.My father lived in the same house as me growing up, and he didn't give a rats a## about me..And still doesn't. .So maybe your mom did you a favor.

    Answer by evelynwest at 10:20 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • ask your aunts and uncles they prob know who your father was/is

    Answer by Lyndall at 9:58 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • I have a friend that is in your situation sort of. Her Mom didn't pass, but she doesn't know who her Dad is. She's finally had to put it to rest as much as she can and somewhat consider the man that helped create her, as something like a sperm donor.
    The only thing I could suggest is to ask around in the area your Mom was when you were conceieved, talk to family to see if they have any idea whatsoever or if she moved from that area, maybe make a profile with your Mom's name in hopes of someone trying to find her from her past and go from there?

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 9:59 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • I've asked about it all from the 2 remaining family members, and her old friends, but all I get is, 'she slept around' 'ask the milkman' ETC. I gave up because it was just too upsetting. But I still wonder........

    Answer by lara_b at 10:08 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • I am there with you. I found out at 13 the man I thought was my dad isnt. I can never get the truth as to who my father is. (everyone in my family thinks its a different guy) I had a rough relationship with my biological mom growing up and only after my adopted mom passed away did we really start to have any kind of relationship. I get evasive answers every time I try to talk to her about it. Our relationship isnt strong enough to continue pushing the subject, so I just had to accept the fact I probably will never know. It is not an easy thing to do, but the longer you dwell on it, the worse you are going to feel. The best thing you can do is focus on making your child's life different. Make sure your kid(s) has a father and a mother who love them and will be there for them. The best thing people in this situation can do is break the cycle, and give your kids the stability we didnt have. Praying 4 u!


    Answer by Tzutchka at 10:26 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • Call a local adoption agency. They are used to dealing with people looking to find their birth parents. They may have some ideas on how to find out.

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:38 AM on May. 5, 2009

  • There must be a paper and records somewhere. By the way..... Pasted is when you put something on paper with pasted something on paper. when my dad died, he passed away., for example.Just a little bit of important info. about usage of the English language.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:58 AM on May. 5, 2009