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What do you think this means?

I was raped as a child for years (5-13 yrs old) and now that I am an adult I often fantasize (I guess you'd call it that... it's what I think about while masturbating) about either being raped again by my husband or actually raping someone myself. The weird thing is... when I am doing the raping.. I am both the aggressor and the victim. I will bounce back and forth in my mind between the 2 people. It weirds me out that I think of this.
I haven't told anyone about this before, not my DH, my therapist, no one. I am ashamed of it, but can't stop.
Please help.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:30 PM on May. 5, 2009 in Health

Answers (2)
  • dont be ashamed. you said therpist so i assume you are already in counciling. i would definatly mention this to them. im not a therapist or anything so i dont know anything about this, but your therapist will not judge you, and if you need further help he will get to the bottom of it. if it is jsut a fantast, maybe you could try some sort of fun sexualy game with ur hubby. jstu a thought. i would talk to therapist first tho. i am very sorry to hear about your childhood.
    RhiannonHunt

    Answer by RhiannonHunt at 12:35 PM on May. 5, 2009

  • Tell your therapist. They have heard this before. Guaranteed. You should not be ashamed either. They can help you and let you know how to deal with this.
    It is not "un-normal" for your circumstances. Do not be afraid to tell them.
    If they have been helping you, they need to know this.

    I send you love and strength. You made it through! You survived! You have a wonderful life ahead of you by the way you talked about your DH.

    Just don't let the fear take you. Tell your therapist.....
    What a beautiful person you are for asking opinions. I admire your strength!
    HUGS...................................
    gr-mom2

    Answer by gr-mom2 at 1:06 PM on May. 5, 2009

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