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what to do

ok so yesterday my sister`s bf told me she was preg, i knew already she was geting big but she tried to hide it. but she smokes i`m worried about the baby shes 9 mos preg and she went to the dr today and he said the baby looks like he has short legs, idk what to say to her im mad then again i feel pain for her, i want to stay pos but if the baby has short legs i know im going to say something mean to her like she shouldnt have smoked ect what would you do if this was your sister friend ect

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:10 PM on May. 5, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (5)
  • One, you're right to be mad and also right to conserve your opinion. Do you tell her what you think and tell her she's an idiot for risking her baby's healthy for her selfish comfort or do you tell her you feel bad for her that she'll have a child that won't look like other kids do? It's up to you.

    If it were me I would wait till she says something then I would tell her what I thought. But I would also say I'd be there for her if she wants to vent but she needs to keep in mind this entire issue could have been avoided if she had taken her child's health into consideration more than he wanting to smoke.
    lilbit022009

    Answer by lilbit022009 at 3:21 PM on May. 5, 2009

  • does she bitch at you for every little thing that she thinks you do wrong? you will prob jsut upset her more. ultrasounds can be wrong, and whos to say tha tthe smoking did cause that? it could be for some total other unrelated thing. dont get me wrong i dont agree with smoking while preg...but it is also her choice and her child
    RhiannonHunt

    Answer by RhiannonHunt at 4:04 PM on May. 5, 2009

  • I don't think smoking cigarettes would cause a growth issue in one particular part of the body. I would bite your tongue, why would you have to say something when there's nothing she can go back and change. Yeah, she messed up, but it's not your place to tell her that, especially if something is wrong with the baby. Your karma could come back and get you too, if there is a growth problem it could be genetic, don't test it out and say anything mean. Maybe if your sister had more family support she could have leaned on you when she had problems quitting smoking, and maybe she wouldn't have hidden an entire pregnancy from you...
    kitten_shuga

    Answer by kitten_shuga at 6:07 PM on May. 5, 2009

  • me and my sister are close idk why she didnt tell me she was preg maybe she didnt want our mom and dad to know, and you dont know my sister she dont want to quit smoking ive tried before and the dr said its most likely from smoking her bf is already mad at her for smoking while shes preg, i told her not to worrie about it it could be a mistake and she lights up a cig what im i supose to say she knows her baby might have probs but she wont stop,
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:26 PM on May. 5, 2009

  • I understand that youre mad, im currently prego and i smoke. I know its unhealthy for the baby, i know im hurting her, but do you understand how hard it is to quit? Dont get me wrong, i have cut down alot on my smoking because i knew i wouldnt be able to go cold-turkey. Just keep in mind, if you where the one who smoked, would you want your sister to sit and lecture you on how its your fault the baby has short legs or how you could have prevented it? I wouldnt. I understand where you are coming from. I also dont think that for the babys legs to be "short" that the smoking alone caused it. from what i have been told, smoking usually causes just low birth weight and some breathing problems in the future or at birth. My mom smoked with all 4 of her kids. I had mild asthma but grew out of it, my sister has it but its very mild, and my other 2 siblings are fine.

    Unless she drinks or does drugs, i wouldnt pissed.
    CJK_2009

    Answer by CJK_2009 at 9:03 PM on May. 5, 2009

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