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Computer addicted kids.. what to do?

My 12 and 13 year old daughters are addicted to the internet. Their father and I normally allow them one hour each day to browse the computer after homework and chores are done. We also do not allow them to be on social networking sites.

Well today we discovered the girls are sneaking our laptop into their rooms after we go to bed and browsing for hours! We know because of the browsing history. They also have created profiles on myspace and facebook. Dh is livid that they have done this, while I am trying to remain calm.

What is the best way to deal with this situation? Are we overacting or being wrong for not allowing them to be on these sites?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:30 PM on May. 6, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I would say no on myspace and yes on facebook. Myspace is one big booty call and its worthless. Facebook is more a place to catch up with friends. I find the atmosphere to be much friendlier and innocent. The punishment is for the deceptive behavior and going behind your back. THATS what I would address. Simply for the fact that if they are willing to be deceptive about this, then what happens when something MORE serious comes up. You need honesty to start off with and being that they are only 12 and 13, you have a long road, as do I...LOL.....The foundation is being set NOW, so make the impression last in them that deceptive behavior is NOT okay and your rules will be followed, but in return, you promise to be fair, open minded and flexible. Good luck.
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 1:21 PM on May. 8, 2009

  • I would allow them to have myspace and facebook but make them give you their password so you can check it daily if wanted. The minute they change the password and not tell you, make them delete the account. I think one hour a night is fair for surfing the web. Then take the laptop in your room with you at night. Solve that problem. Also there is a program or a way to limit how long your kids can be on the computer or sign on line. It signs off when their hour is up but I just don't know what exactly it is.. I just remember my Aunt did this with her kids.
    amy31308

    Answer by amy31308 at 7:34 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • i agree if you have their passwords and can check on them than it shouldn't be an issue. as far as taking your laptops and sneaking on the internet after you have told them to go to bed, i would ground them from any computer activities for a certain length of time (they don't need the internet for homework, we used reg books at the library when we were kids) and then i would put a password on the laptops and keep them with in your site after the girls go to bed, and take them into your room when you go to bed
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 7:37 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • you know what i agree with the password, also i think you should also make them their own file on the computer and lock it with a password. dont tell them the password and that way if they ever try to sneak your computer again they cant get into it anyway, while you are at it lock your and your husbands file on the lap top too so that they cant just log on to your stuff. my mother has that system with my 15 year old sister. and so far it works....
    nattysmommie

    Answer by nattysmommie at 7:45 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • unplug the desktop or confiscate the laptop. You are the parent. You are in control.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:12 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • Put a password on all computers and keep your laptop in your room. Set a timer and once the timer goes off, they are done.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:48 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • They are teenage girls lol They probably have a crush one somone and are trying to talk to them a lot. Put a password on the laptop and ground them lol
    MammaBella

    Answer by MammaBella at 9:50 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • First off, don't listen to the poster above me, she's not even a mom yet and is a teen herself. Taking teen parenting advice from a pregnant teen is kind of silly!

    The girls broke your trust and disobeyed you. If they are not going to follow the rules about the internet, what else are they going to try and do behind your back? I would lock them out of any household computers until they prove they can follow the rules you set for their own protection.
    yogapantz

    Answer by yogapantz at 10:02 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • I wouldn't dramatize it so much, its a common 'crime' at their age. But yes, they broke the rules and should be punished. After that, I would take the PCs and put them in a room where they won't get them late at night - and I'd set a severe punishment if they somehow do! I do the same for my kids cell phones - if they aren't by the phone,by the door, charging over night, they lose them for a day... nothing major, but it works like a charm!!

    I don't believe in passwording every thing, but I'd make them be friends with you on the social sites so you can keep an eye on the pictures they post, etc. I never comment on my kids stuff, but I see it and the comments made by others. After that, I consider the email and other exchanges are personal - unless the was a major problem, I wouldn't ever ask to look at them.
    PhillyinFrance

    Answer by PhillyinFrance at 3:34 PM on May. 7, 2009

  • my daughter is almost 13. she gets on the computer from 7a.m-2p.m. everyday. that is her set time. my son who is almost 15 gets the computer from 2p.m.-8p.m. if my son isn't on the computer during his time then my daughter gets back on. she is so addicted to this computer, and texting on her cell phone. both my kids have a myspace account, i look at there profiles every other day, but i don't have there password. if i see something i don't like i make them change it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:44 AM on May. 9, 2009

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