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do i introduce my new boyfriend (whenever i get one ) to my girls from da start or do i wait to c where things r going first???

im a single mom was wit da father of my girls 4 six years. broke up 3 yrs ago had 1 other relationship since then for almost 2 yrs my girls adored him but things didnt work out. a little skeptical about dating and having my girls get attached again

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:13 PM on May. 6, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • I would never introduce a new boyfriend to my kids before I knew for sure it was going to work. I would wait 6 months-1 year before introducing them and even then just take it slow. It's not good for kids to keep getting attached to every man that comes in your life. My sister made that mistake with her 4 kids and they're so screwed up because of it!! Kids need stability and if people are coming and going every couple of months it messes them up emotionally, makes it hard for them to connect to the one that will matter because they close themselves off to avoid getting hurt again.
    mommabear2008

    Answer by mommabear2008 at 9:19 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • Personally, wouldn't introduce my children to any man unless I knew it was going to be permanent. This is where "Daddy issues" come from. If you think it breaks your heart when these relationships go south, imagine how they feel. It's just another man in their lives that rejects them.
    beckcorc

    Answer by beckcorc at 9:18 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • I would wait a while before intoducing them, but wouldnt wait to long because it is important to see how he acts towards your girls!
    mrsmamaj

    Answer by mrsmamaj at 9:19 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • wait that way kids dont get attacthed or confused i had to tell that to my sd's bm she introduced them to every tom dick and harry then it was like ohh moms b/f mark.. well what happend to steve..mom said he was a jerk. then moms b/f jerry well what happend to mark oh he was a jerk. there were 8 in one year. they loved kevin they loved jim they loved rich. so i would wait with my dd she didnt know i was seeing someone for 6 months then i introduced as my friend and my dd who was 6 asked me do i like like him or just like him i said like like. after a few month introduceing ourselfs and kids ( about a year ) we asked for the next step.. move in.. it was great with them kids all liked each other and us adults. were now married. its been 6 years. still all good but we did wait. i didnt want my dd to meet every tom dick and harry which is good cause after 2 months of dateing i found out he looked at kiddie pictures...out the door
    tabbys4

    Answer by tabbys4 at 9:24 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • go slow. Just introduce him as a friend. They understand friends. They also understand that sometimes friends come and go. It's as easy as that.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:36 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • You should certainly wait until you know it is a true and lasting relationship. It's not fair to have a person in a childs life and then have them dissapear.
    Rachel24517

    Answer by Rachel24517 at 10:08 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • Put your girls first, always...get to know the future boyfriend well enough first to make sure he isn't a jerk or weirdo..they are out there. Once you know he is a good guy, take everyone to the park or out for lunch, so everyone doesn't feel awkward. If your girls have any bad feelings though, listen to them and let them know that their feeling are important to you. You don't want them thinking they come second. Good luck.
    army_wife2000

    Answer by army_wife2000 at 10:17 PM on May. 6, 2009

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