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how do i get my kids to stop saying bad words when everyone else in the house wont stop?

i have tried so many times to get them to stop saying bad words but they wont listen.I live with other family members(in-laws),there are 11 kids total and their parents dont care if they walk around saying so many bad things.i have tried to talk to the kids but i cant get through to them. what should i do? HELP ME

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Mama_C_of_3

Asked by Mama_C_of_3 at 10:45 PM on May. 6, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (10)
  • if they are hearing other people saying it than they have to assume its ok. language is one of the things that they have to see/hear to learn the right way. with my dd when someone says something on accident, they sit her down and tell her they are sorry they said it, its a mean word that hurts peoples feelings so she doesn't say it (shes 3) however its not an everyday occurence and everyone in the house is willing to do this in order to prevent her from thinking the language is ok. maybe just talk to them, tell them that sometimes people say mean words, but that doesn't mean its ok for them to say it.
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 10:50 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • Any way to get out of this living situation? Because until they're out of it you may have no recourse. Unless you impose a punishment/reward system. If they correct one of the kids who cusses, give 'em a ticket or a quarter. When they cuss themselves. take it away. Tickets can be redeemed for prizes, quarters are cash for an outing.

    Bribery does work.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 10:51 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • Can you punish the other kids, like a time out? If so, start putting each of them in time out every single time they say a bad word...including your own kids. If this isn't possible, at least talk to your own kids, explain to them that sometimes other kids do bad things but you know that your kids are better behaved and they shouldn't say these bad words. I have my step dd and her 4 kids, and my dd and her 3 kids living with us now.....I know how stressful this can be. Hang in there, just keep talking to your kids and let them know they are special and better than that.
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 11:19 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • We are starting a coin jar... we give it to my son and when he hears someone else say it he takes his jar to whom he hears the word from and gets a quarter from them. Everyone gets after him for saying the words but everyone still says them. So... we're all going to work together by forking out the money to avoid saying it around him.
    sailfishmommy

    Answer by sailfishmommy at 11:27 PM on May. 6, 2009

  • Children mimic those around them, this is why it is so important to set a great example for our children. We need to eat healthy foods, so they know they should be doing the same; we need to treat everyone with respect; we need to use good grammar and proper language so they understand that this is how successful people speak.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 5:51 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • Next time a family member says something around your LO say "did you hear what _____ said? thats a bad word, lets try not to use that one anymore!" IT will work even better if said family member is in hearing range. Not only will it teach them what words are bad, it may start to shame your family members into using swear words less.
    katzmeow726

    Answer by katzmeow726 at 7:13 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • My parents never curbed their language in front of us, and neither do we in front of my son. I didn't curse at all until I was in high school, and my three year old (nearly 4) has only cursed a couple of times.

    We were taught, and we are teaching our son, that there are Grown-Up Words. Grown-Up Words are just like grown up drinks and other things that only grown ups can do. Adults can use these words, but they are not for kids. It's worked quite well so far, and worked great with me and my brothers.

    When LO slips and says a "bad" word, just tell him "No, no. Only big people say that word. That's a Grown-Up Word. You may say (insert OK word here) instead. "
    AnnieMcD

    Answer by AnnieMcD at 7:52 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • We swear like CRAZY in my house! My kids do not say bad words. If they do the are repremanded. We have taught them that those are adult words and that they were not allowed to say them. That is just something I have done from the time they were very young. They are older now and if they say (not a bad word, but something I think is a little inappropriate) I have told them to find a funny word to replace it. Now my 9 year-old calls his bottom, his raisin maker. :-D I think it's hilarious!! (Maybe i'm just weird lol)
    CrystalJC73

    Answer by CrystalJC73 at 8:21 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • My mother NEVER taught me not to swear. She just didn't care. She is Argentine, & I think she just took it as part of the American language. Swearing doesn't even phase her. I have a HORRIBLE sailors mouth, but i try so, so hard to not swear. My 7 year old daughter does not like that i swear. I told her that my mother never taught me NOT to swear, but that i am going to be different. I am going to teach her not to swear. I told my girl that it just sounds ugly, & that when people swear too much, it makes them seem as if they are not that smart. So, her & I made a pack, that every time i swear i have to give her a quarter. So far it's worked real great. My daughter does not swear (although i heard her say "friggen" & i didn't like it), and she is helping me work on my bad habit of swearing. So far she is the best teacher.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:03 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • Crystal, I'm glad to see my family is not the only one like that! LOL
    AnnieMcD

    Answer by AnnieMcD at 9:39 AM on May. 7, 2009

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