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What gives people the right to judge you at church? You have to read this crap!

This lady at my church told me this
that since Im an unwed mother, my baby will go to hell, I will go to hell,
that I shouldnt be proud to be pregnant, I should be ashamed of it, I should give the baby up for adoption because I am from a broken home and the babys father is absent.
And because of that it makes me an unfit mother.I should not be on medicade and how dare I take advantage of the government like that. And I told her that I deserve a little happieness and she told me that I dont deserve anything. That God is punishing me for "fornicating" before marrage!!!! I have been going to this Lutheran church my whole life and nobody has ever talked like that to me before! I am not kidding, the other day I got a letter in the mail from her. That jerk sent me ADOPTION PAPERS! I am all for adoption dont get me wrong but that is my choice not anyone elses! What gives people the right to judge and crytisize you like that?


Asked by Alysia_Moore at 1:19 AM on May. 7, 2009 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 12 (688 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (34)
  • I really hate that people view adoption like this. Adoption is a beautiful thing that does serve a purpose and should. But NO ONE has the right to tell you that you cannot mother. The pp is right, God put the baby in your womb for a reason. In a situation of unwed pregnancy, if she is so "moved by it" she should be mentoring young women to avoid it... Furthermore, God, the God I know anyway, doesn't send people from his presence for disobeying him... I do believe none of us would go to heaven if that were the case.

    Blessings with your new child btw. Being a single mom is a bit tough and I hope you keep right on going to church. Like anything else man made there is good and bad to found there. But at least going there your intentions are clear to your child kwim? :) Plus they get some great memories there!

    Answer by CooksWife at 8:08 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • nothing and let me tell you in church or not i would have had some very not nice things to say back

    Answer by vabchmommy at 1:22 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • I would take the letter to your preacher and explain to him that obviously he needs to make it a point to have a sermon over being a hypocrite of the church.Or I would be looking for another church with members that practice what the bible teaches

    Answer by ronjwake at 1:23 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • Yeah, she has no right to tell you those things. It's none of her business. What a bitch. I think I would have said some pretty nasty things back.

    Answer by NicMorgan at 1:26 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • it dont suprise me at all i have had dumb ass folks tell me the same shit just because im married to a black man and my children are mixed just goes to show u how ignorent folks are and it should teach yourself to not pass judment on others no matter what there life decieons are..

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:26 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • I'd get a new church. I got pregnant at 18. My church was sooo supportive. I don't know how I would have done it all without them.

    People like that insane woman don't realize that in God's eyes all sins are equal. You sinned, you made a mistake, but she has also sinned many times. Neither of you are going to hell for your sins if you believe, confess and turn your life around. Sorry you have to deal with fanatical ignorance.

    Answer by toriandgrace at 1:26 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • Keep in mind that this is just the opinion of ONE of you church members, not all share this view. Church goers are typically the first to cast a stone. Tell her to read up on her bible more, God wants us to love everyone no matter what, let he be the judge. I say that you speak to your pastor about this and see what can be done because this is basically harassment. And let me be the first to say, what a Beyatch!

    Answer by KadensMom907 at 1:27 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • ewwwww!!!! What a nasty person! Well, I had BOTH of my kids before I got married so I guess we are all just goin to hell.... at least she wont be there with us to make it miserable!!! LOL Teasing!!! But ewwww what a rude woman! What crawled up her butt and died? I wouldve been even more rude back! You should write 'return to sender' on the envelope of papers she sent you and send them back to her! Gosh... some people! Unfortunately I have had a bad church situation too.... why are people soooo quick to judge- What about if you have a family and a member of your family dies... does that mean that you have a broken family? NO!!!! Gosh, this really made me soooo upset! Tell her to mind her own business and leave you alone!!! Good luck!!!

    Answer by sxc_mom_of2 at 1:28 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • and lots of people wonder y so many of us belive in god but dont go to church cuz of hypocrits like the wanch u speak of

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:28 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • omg i prolly would have went to jail for stomping a mud puddle in her...

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:32 AM on May. 7, 2009