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2 part question: YOUNG MOMS- Do you wish you had waited to have your kids? OLDER MOMS- Do you wish you had had them sooner?

Be honest. I had my son when i was 2weeks shy of 21... And i have #2 on the way.. I LOVE being a young(er) mom and wouldnt trade it for the world.. I sometimes wish i had finsihed college first (dropped out WAY befoer my kids came along) but i know i can always go back.. im just wondering if any wishes they had waited or started sooner..

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JrsMommy07

Asked by JrsMommy07 at 8:36 AM on May. 7, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 10 (419 Credits)
Answers (57)
  • well I fall into both since I had my first at 23 and my third at 36. I did not feel ready to be a mom at 23. And wish I had waited a few more years. However at 36 I did not have the same energy to do the lack of sleep all nighters I did when I was in my 20s. However I really don't think one age was better than the next. Both had advantages and disadvantages. However now I wouldn't tade what I did.
    pagirl71

    Answer by pagirl71 at 8:45 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • I was 19 when I had my daughter and I'm 28 now. I did struggle in the beginning but it has paid off. I feel like I have a lot of energy left in me, I know I'm still hip, and I enjoy how things have turned out.

    That is just me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:58 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • Some of us didn't have that option of being a younger mom...

    I struggled with infertility for many years before going on Clomid at 27. I delivered my first dd stillborn at 36 weeks at the age of 28. We began the process to adopt our dd at the age of 30 when we met the requirements for China. We did not bring her home until I was 32 yrs old. 8 months later, we found out that I was pregnant somehow. I delivered our now 9 month old dd at the age of 33. I am now 34 yrs old and have 3 girls...2 living and 1 in Heaven. It was a long and difficult road, but I am a much stronger person and I think that I am a better parent now than I would have been when we were younger. We are more stable financially than when we were 20, we are stronger as a couple than we were 16 yrs ago, and we have grown as people in that time.
    mcginnisc

    Answer by mcginnisc at 9:04 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • I had my daughter two days prior to my 30th birthday. The timing worked for us, although we did have fertility issues. Essentially all of our friends are college educated, and most have post-graduate degrees. By the time they get married, settle in and have children they are well in to their thirties. Several have had fertility issues. For that reason, I would say around age 28 would be optimal. But, I would never encourage a woman to forego education or a suitable partner just to get her timing down.
    kara_g.

    Answer by kara_g. at 9:04 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • I had my first child at 19. I was pregnant with my 4th at 26 when I decided to go to college. If I could do it over, I would have done things in a different order and maybe made some better choices along the way, but I don't regret having kids young. They've made my life very interesting.
    AngieG.

    Answer by AngieG. at 9:20 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • The only regret I have is that I finished college after our oldest was born. I hated having to leave him, even though he was first left with my sister-in-law and then later with my very good friend. They both treated him as well as he could have been treated by someone other than me, I suppose, but he is to this day, the most insecure of my children. For that reason and that reason only, I wish I had finished school first. I felt I had to finish because my hubby and I had promised my dad when we married that we would finish school. We both kept our word, but it was a lot harder than either of us thought it would be.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 9:27 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • There are a few things I thought I would do before having children. Like get married and finish school. I look at it as an adventure though that we will work on together. I fell I am old enough to to be rational and realistic, but young enough to still play.
    Mary_CoreysMom

    Answer by Mary_CoreysMom at 9:48 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • I had my first when I was 2 weeks past 18, I'm expecting #2 1 month before my 20th bday.

    I am a full time college student, it's rougher with kids but they're my motivation, and I don't think I would have waited with either of them b/c I can be active with them more being younger.
    LCmommyof2

    Answer by LCmommyof2 at 10:06 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • I was 20 when i had my son and it was planned that way. i want to get my baby having days over when i am young. i dont know why but that is the way that i want it. and no i do not regret having my son this young.
    newlife627

    Answer by newlife627 at 10:32 AM on May. 7, 2009

  • I fall into both, I had my first at 19 and my 5th at 40. I had more energy and I did not worry so much with my first 3, but my last two are only 13 months apart and are boys. They are very active and I now work full time. I keep up with them because I don't think it is fair for them to feel like they have an old lady for a Mom. The only down side to having kids when you are older is the thought that they will lose me and their Dad eariler than most people their age do. I love raising my kids and would not trade it for the world. My oldest is 23 and out on his own, my girls are 18 and 15 and won't be around much longer either. Then it is just me and the DH and the boys, so I am sure things will get easier.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 10:42 AM on May. 7, 2009

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