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What can I do or better yet do I even have the right to ask him to not stay out so late at work?

Okay my DF has a job where he can go to work whenever however because of the sort of job it is its better if he goes out at night, just because there is more of a chance that people will be home instead of out at work during the day, well my problem is I HATE being home alone at night until 3 or 4 or sometimes even 5 in the morning I cant sleep because I want to be able to hear everything that is going on and I guess its just my fear of being here alone with our baby son, so I always stay up and have the phone next to me, well last night I told him I hate that he stays out that late because I hate being home alone like that for that long that late at night, and he just said that he has to workhes gotta make money, so was I wrong for telling him that? What am I supposed to do jsut suck it up, because lemme tell ya if he is going to be gone like this all the time I want a gun or something, so what do you think?


Asked by Anonymous at 2:53 PM on May. 7, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • Oh!! haha that explains it! I don't blame you for feeling nervous. I have done two things to help me sleep at night. First I got a home alarm kit on ebay for about $100. I've had it a few years and it works great. Each door has a magnet thing attached to the frame and the door. Once the alarm is set when the magnet connection is broken the siren goes off, very loud!!! It also has the option off calling 911 or using a company to monitor but I am quite happy just knowing if a door opens. I feel the noise will be enough to scare anyone off and at least I won't sleep though it. The other thing I have is a dog. If a dog is an option they are great, they will notify you of anything going on including a fire. Good Luck!

    Answer by MACY7108 at 3:40 PM on May. 7, 2009

  • Ummmmm people might be home in the middle of the night but I don't believe they are up for company. What is he doing for his job??

    Answer by MACY7108 at 2:57 PM on May. 7, 2009

  • i think its not wrong to express your fears to him and the fact that you don't like it. but hes right too and he has to make money. as far as not being able to sleep when hes not there, keep the phone by your bed and maybe a knife under your mattress. thats what i do when dh is deployed. and i make sure to triple check the locks etc...maybe if you put a fan or something in your room you won't hear the little noises as much so they won't freak you out all the time. do you have a dog? they are great home alarms you could suggest that you guys get one if that would make you feel better too

    Answer by vabchmommy at 2:57 PM on May. 7, 2009

  • OP here- and he is a repoman so he isnt looking to visit with the people just trying to catch them while they are home and their cars are there, and I know he has to work he is our only source of income because I am a SAHM I just hate it, I feel helpless ya know

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:00 PM on May. 7, 2009

  • my SIL is a repo man and my dd hates it when he goes out late too but if you are scared then move to a better neighborhood. You don't need a gun with a child in the house. What if you turned your schedule around and stayed up at night and slept in the day? I did that when I was a SAHM. I'd say go with him but that can be dangerous work.

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:33 PM on May. 7, 2009

  • Get a big dog. I'm not kidding. Doesn't have to be an attack dog or anything, a big nice dog will do. Trust me, you will feel better. My advice would be to work with a trainer so your dog is extremely mindful and polite; a well-trained dog gives the illusion that that dog can do a number of protective things on command.

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 3:39 PM on May. 7, 2009

  • admckenzie---actually I used to go out and do it with him, I actually did it before I met him too I love repoing but ever since I have become a SAHM and am here alone with my 9 month old it gets scarry thankfully our neighbors are all pretty watchful and one even works for the sherrif but I still get nervous, I just cant help but think the one time I let my gaurd down is when something creepy will happen, I like the alarm idea though Macy, I unfortunatly cant have a dog because we rent and no pet allowed I think I will be telling my DF about getting on of those door alarms

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:00 PM on May. 7, 2009