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What would you do????

So my ex husband and his girlfriend moved in together, which matters to me none. But I send my child over there one day a week. Which again as long as she is good to my child I don't mind it. But the one thing thats is bothering me is she has a myspace with pictures of my child on it every where. Even little hearts with my ex's name, hers and my sons... Would this bother you? If it did do you think sending her a message thru myspace asking politely to take them off would be okay? Or should I call my ex and tell him to have her remove them. Or am I over reacting?

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jasesmommy0529

Asked by jasesmommy0529 at 11:20 PM on May. 7, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 13 (1,078 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • she loves your child. it would probably bother me to an extent but i'd try to ignore it, b/c she does obviously love your son so at least you know that he is well taken care of and loved when he is with her. as for the pictures if you don't have pictures of your son on your page than i don't think she should have pictures of your son posted on the internet either. and as long as she doesn't say "my son" in the titles or anything than i would let it be.
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 11:23 PM on May. 7, 2009

  • it probley would bother me also, shes probley doing this to bother you. I wouldn't worry to much about it though you know that its YOUR child and so does your ex, you know i probley would let it go but it is really really bugging you try to take care of it in a reasonable way. it sounds to be she just loves your child.
    Amanda2430

    Answer by Amanda2430 at 11:44 PM on May. 7, 2009

  • It would bother me too. BUT try to think of it this way... which would be worse for your child?
    A woman trying to forge a happy, loving place for your child. A child who will probably end up with 4 sets of grandparents and half-siblings on both sides.
    OR
    A woman who tolerates your child so she can be with your ex. A child who will feel pushed out and unwanted as the relationship goes forward and new children arrive. A child who will wonder if the same thing will happen in YOUR house when you meet someone.
    kaycee14

    Answer by kaycee14 at 11:57 PM on May. 7, 2009

  • I agree with the other women. Yes, it may cause feelings of jealousy in you, but your child is LOVED. You trying to stop it might backfire, hopefully this wouldn't happen, but what if she became angry with you and took it out on him by being mean, rude, or worse? Be glad that this woman is treating your child with love instead of as a burden.

    The only thing is if she has the pictures publicly viewable, I don't think it would be a problem if you POLITELY requested that she put them on private, since he IS your child.
    Kersten

    Answer by Kersten at 12:04 AM on May. 8, 2009

  • I guess I would want to know why it bothers you? Because they are not his original family? Why does this make you uncomfortable. Maybe she just thinks that your son and your ex are great and wants to show it. I think that this is a person I would appreciate. My ex and his wife are great friends of myself and my husband now. I appreciate her soooooo much she loves my kids like I do, so the kids and our grandkids don't have to have all those seperate holidays and birthdays.We are all going to celebrate our first grandson's graduation this year. I hope you will have a good relationship with her too. Oh yes, and Happy Mothers Day
    gammiej

    Answer by gammiej at 1:48 AM on May. 8, 2009

  • when me and my now dh were seperated and his gf stayed with him at his house i would go to drop off our dd and see sheets of paper that the gf had drawn on that said "ali(the gf) chris( my now dh) and emma(our dd) together as a famiy forever". oh i was pissed and confronted her screaming and i ended up breaking her nose. oops
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:02 AM on May. 8, 2009

  • Dont let it get to you, your daughter is loved, atleast she thinks of her in a loving way... As long as the child isnt in harms way let her do it.
    Tearstar

    Answer by Tearstar at 10:53 AM on May. 8, 2009

  • I suppose it would depend on whether or not the pictures were a true testament to how the gf feels or how she WANTS everyone (including herself) to think she feels. I know everyone is saying she lovers your child, but pics on myspace are not a sign of love, they're just pics on the internet. If you're uncomfortable with the pics or how they're presented (like a PP said, if she's calling herself mom in any of them or referring to your son as part of her family), then you should take issue. Not only are they NOT married (so that undermines any "family" arguments there), it's not appropriate for her to pretend she's something she's not or that she has something (your family) that she doesn't have - yes, she's living there. But for how long? She's not married, so what happens if/when they break up? If that happens, then the pics are still on her page...and you can't control that. Maybe I'm just a cynic, but talk to them.
    JPsMommy605

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 10:56 AM on May. 8, 2009

  • if you are uncomfortable with pictures of your son on the internet in general, than, i say you should explain that to your ex.

    however if you just don't like the family picture type thing then, i think you should let it go.
    aly38914290

    Answer by aly38914290 at 1:19 PM on May. 8, 2009

  • I think it depends on how she truly feels about him... many ppl put on what my fiance calls an "image" and she could just be acting like that. I also think it depends on how your son feels about this gf. What I would recomend is to notice how your son talks about her and how his time with her is. Ask him when he comes home what he did at his dads... I would also see how his facials and expression are when she comes into conversation. If he doesnt seem too bothered by it, then I would let it go.
    mommy24422

    Answer by mommy24422 at 3:53 PM on May. 8, 2009

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