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I cant! I cant! I cant!

My dd is 2.5 & recently she has started saying "I can't" about EVERYTHING! She cant throw away her trash. she can stop jumping on the bed. she cant draw. she cant cant cant....

So did your kid go through a "I cant" phase? And how long till this ends! And advice on it?

I try telling her on stuff i know thats difficult to keep trying. dont give up. you can do anything! but i know the " i cant " has nothing to do with her ability its just another phase..


Asked by MommaTasha1003 at 3:51 PM on May. 8, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • It is a phase, and annoying phase for sure. Just remind her that she can do it and don't let her fall back on it. I will offer to "help" when needed and then when we are done,I say "SEE you can! Great job!" She will come out the phase...sadly she will enter another :).

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 4:02 PM on May. 8, 2009

  • I am going through that right now. I tell my son "I do not want to here you say you can't there is no such thing as I can't." I also tell him to keep trying.

    Answer by 2wndrfl_btrflys at 3:56 PM on May. 8, 2009

  • they have no clue what that really means.. My boy im here to tell ya.. they are just lazy.. LOL dont worry this will go by soon.. im hoping..

    Answer by HottMamaRossx2 at 3:59 PM on May. 8, 2009

  • try wording the requests differently. Like if you want her to throw out her trash say to her"Do you want to throw it away and get a cookie, or throw it away and get a sticker?" then she does it but still feels she is the boss of something. Toddlers are just learning to control their environment and this tactic saved me as my son went thru the "I cants" as well.

    Answer by Bearsjen at 6:20 PM on May. 8, 2009

  • oh my gosh my DS is doing that right now and it is driving me insane. He says he cant then i tell him to do it and then all the time doing whatever it is and even when he's done he still says i cant.

    Answer by kclick213 at 6:51 PM on May. 8, 2009

  • I can't remember when my daughter started doing that, but she was around that age. She's almost 6 now & she still pulls it. We do not accept "I can't" Firstly, you don't know you can't because you haven't tried. If you have tried, then you need to say "I need help". If she says "I can't" to something ridiculous, like when I tell her to get dressed or draw a mermaid for her Grampa's birthday, I tell her to "get real", or "that's a load of bull crap & you know it". I roll my eyes in a very exaggerated way & make her laugh. She knows she can do it, she's just being a drama queen. Call her out on it now. Either way, it won't stop. It's just how you handle it that will determine if she just throws out a staple "I can't before she does everything, or if she spirals into fits of despair. You gotta love them girls!


    Answer by carlye828 at 7:10 AM on May. 9, 2009