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confused and dont know what to do any more

im 7 weeks pregnant with my 1st child and my bf isnt home 5 out of the 7 days a week because of his job and when he is home alls we do is argue and it feels like he doesnt wanna be part of the babys life. a few times hes said "i dont even believe ur pregnant"... since he isnt home when i have my appointments. but his mom knows that i am since she is with when i go. i dont wanna leave him cause i love him so much and i want this to work out but i cant really talk to him cause alls we end up doing is argue. please no bashing or anything like that.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:02 AM on May. 9, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (10)
  • If its bad now wait until the baby is born.it will only get worse.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:04 AM on May. 9, 2009

  • He's scared. I don't think he's ready to be a dad, so don't be surprised if he tries to break it off with you...regardless of your pregnancy.

    But, his mom is in your corner. Talk to her to see what she has to say. Tell her what is going on with her son.
    timelessglass

    Answer by timelessglass at 12:06 AM on May. 9, 2009

  • was he like this before you were pregnant? if not maybe its just the inital shock still of the whole i'm going to be a dad thing. thats tough for guys just like it is on us, but then they add the having to take care of you and baby to it and freak out. my husband and i were married for 4 yrs before we finally got pregnant and had our first baby and towards the middle i noticed he would act like a dick for no apparent reason and i finally asked him if he really wanted kids or if he'd just been saying that all along. and thats when we sat down and talked and it came out that he was just freaking out and taking it out on me. so maybe sit down talk to him and just find out if thats the issue, try to do it on one of his days off when he is more relaxed and don't approach it like its going to be an argument. if its something else and you guys really don't think you can work it out, he can still be a dad even if you aren't together
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 12:07 AM on May. 9, 2009

  • having a baby will nto fix anything!!! Try talking to him-if he wants to be mean about it, and wont even talk, then he is not worth your time!!!
    StacyDeAnn

    Answer by StacyDeAnn at 12:15 AM on May. 9, 2009


  • why do you have "appointments" if you are only 7 weeks pregnant?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:16 AM on May. 9, 2009

  • Just sit down and talk with him, when i talk to my bf about stuff like this ( i am 16 weeks) I always say, "honey can we talk without arguing, there is something really important that is on my mind.."
    And if he cares enough he will sit down and talk to you. And just explain that with a lot of "i feel like..." and "its hard for me when" But make sure to say it really calm.
    " Its hard for me when, you say things like i dont think you are pregnant. Because i love you so much, and i am excited about having a family with you, but sometimes i feel like im the only one.
    is there something else that you need to talk to me about? Are you not ready or scared? Because we are in this together, and we need to be supportive of eachother..." He will listen if nothing else, and at hopefully he will open up about how he feels...
    ScEmz

    Answer by ScEmz at 12:40 AM on May. 9, 2009

  • His mom being with you is good!
    I suggest you also go to couples counseling.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:40 AM on May. 9, 2009

  • Please please please! Whatever you do! DO NOT have an abortion. Your boyfriend seems a little on the emotionally abusive side. I could be wrong, but that's just what it sounds like. Just try not to get too stressed out as that could lead to a miscarriage. Talk to his mom, ask her advice. She knows her son better than anyone. I bet you that.
    ArmyM0mmy2Be

    Answer by ArmyM0mmy2Be at 1:17 AM on May. 9, 2009

  • if it gets worse id leave him...he sounds like he could be potentially abusive and I dont think its a good idea for you or your baby to be in that situation...but at the same time he could be in shock.Only time can tell
    hug4akiss

    Answer by hug4akiss at 1:29 AM on May. 9, 2009

  • I know things can be hard. There were times when i thought that my husband didnt want to deal with it either. I talked to him about it and then i relized that because its so soon that he just wasnt ready to talk about it there were things that he had to worry about then with work and school that he didnt want to come home to talk about that. He just wanted to relax. But then one day he got all excited about it and went nuts in walmart taking pics of everything he saw that he wanted so he could tell his mom about it. Just give him time. there is probably alot of things hes worryed about with work that this is just to much for him right now.
    Shelii

    Answer by Shelii at 1:47 PM on May. 9, 2009

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