Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

how long did you and your SO wait to say the L word

Just wondering how long you waited before saying "I love you" .... especially those of you who dated AFTER having children. Does having kids make you feel differently about saying that word?? It does for me. I think about how much I love my son and can't even imagine loving anyone else as much as that and i've been dating my boyfriend for about 4-5 months and I haven't said it yet.

Answer Question
 
vivalaham

Asked by vivalaham at 2:52 PM on May. 9, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • My husband said it about a month after we started dating, which was a week after we made things official. It was fast, but we've been together almost 5 years now and we couldn't be happier!!
    AnnHenderson

    Answer by AnnHenderson at 2:56 PM on May. 9, 2009

  • I've seen people that have said it within days of meeting each other, and then some people never say it because it's just a phrase to them, they show it instead.
    I personally never say it unless I feel it. And you're right, you never will love anyone as much as you do your children. It's unconditional love where with a man, it's different, he CAN destroy that love where no matter what your child does, you may not like their personality, or their choices but you'll always love them.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 3:19 PM on May. 9, 2009

  • Yea, we waited probably about 5 months into our relationship to say those words, we wanted to make sure that we meant them, well he told me 3 weeks after we started seeing each other, and I told him that there was no way that he could possibly love me that quickly!! Told him that I liked him a whole bunch, and loved to spend time with him, but wasn't ready to say those words yet... Then after 5 months I told him that I loved him, and he was like FINALLY..LOL.
    pamelajqs

    Answer by pamelajqs at 3:46 PM on May. 9, 2009

  • A couple of weeks after we started dating
    Fallaya

    Answer by Fallaya at 3:59 PM on May. 9, 2009

  • Lets see. We got married 2 1/2 months after we met. I told him 'I love you' first, in a card. October 18 I told him.
    Buffie95

    Answer by Buffie95 at 4:25 PM on May. 9, 2009

  • Oh, we met Oct 5. Forgot that part!
    Buffie95

    Answer by Buffie95 at 4:25 PM on May. 9, 2009

  • I was married to an abuser who would beat me while saying he loved me. I no longer want to hear those words. I now have the philosophy of don't tell me, show me. Words have hollow meaning sometimes but actions are clear. (imo)
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:37 PM on May. 9, 2009

  • So that's a tough one because just like so many other emotions we all experience them in different ways. First let me say that the LOVE that you have for a child is totally different than the LOVE that you have for an SO....you love your children, you are IN LOVE with your SO. If you were IN LOVE with your kids there would be a problem there that could get you in some serious trouble! You can only follow your heart to know when the proper (if ever) time is to say I Love You to someone. It's a deeply meaningful gesture. But is entirely overused especially in today's society. I told my current SO I loved him 2 1/2 months after we started dating. He told me he loved me 3 weeks after we started dating. I only say I Love You when I mean, I don't use it as a conversation piece or at the "pre-determined" times that most do, parting ways, leaving a phone call. When I feel that overwhelming feeling I express it with actions and words.
    smilinghug

    Answer by smilinghug at 5:17 PM on May. 9, 2009

  • After about 3-4 weeks of dating. I said it first and it took him a few weeks later. We have been together 9 years May 9, 2009 and married for 6 years on May 3, 2009.
    Kimx3babies

    Answer by Kimx3babies at 5:26 PM on May. 9, 2009

  • I had my 5 yr old son when I met my guy and 4 days after we met we told each other we loved each other. We have been going strong for 2 years now
    worriedmommy600

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 6:19 PM on May. 9, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.