Answer by Anonymous at 7:59 PM on May. 10, 2009
Answer by onethentwins at 3:28 PM on May. 10, 2009
Answer by lillie023 at 3:38 PM on May. 10, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 4:42 PM on May. 10, 2009
Answer by lillie023 at 5:12 PM on May. 10, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 7:29 PM on May. 10, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 7:31 PM on May. 10, 2009
I too would love birth mothers to triumph over the lies of guilt and shame. If you ever get the chance to read the book Lillie023 reference, The Girls Who Went Away, you'llsee where it comes from. Guilt and Shame was heaped upon those women and they were warned never to tell anyone and to forget all about the child they had. I know a woman from that era who's amazing and highly successful. She still feels shame and is horrified at the thought of her peers knowing about her son, even though she's been in reunion with him for 7 years. Those of us who know her are shocked because she seems so confident and fabulous. They really did do a number on those girls back then.
Answer by onethentwins at 7:47 PM on May. 10, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 8:01 PM on May. 10, 2009
That's a great point. Adoptees that have both mothers in their lives can feel a lot of loyalty issues on mothers day. They know they should really spend it with their amoms, but may feel guilty about not seeing bmom. So if she has her own day, it's almost like a gift to Adoptees. I like that a lot. Also, an adult adoptee once told me that while we bmoms are wishing our adoptees could be with us, that many of them feel left out that they cant be with us and their birth siblings. Celebrating birthmothers day means that he doesn't have to share her with her other children. That really puts a positive spin on things.
Answer by onethentwins at 8:08 PM on May. 10, 2009