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How does having a baby change things....?

I posted something similar in one of my groups but I wanted to ask ALL ladies out there....For those of you that were young and still completely in love with your men when you first got pregnant, how did the baby change things? Like, did you guys still find ways to have fun together? Did all the romance and excitement in the relationship just fly out of the window?? I'm sure it is something that takes a lot of work. But maybe if you truly love each other enough, it doesn't have to end all of the fun, right? Thanx! :)

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Asked by LittleMonster22 at 10:50 PM on May. 10, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 3 (15 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • After 10 months we are starting to figure it out. I have noticed that I am noticing if "imperfections" more. If you really love someone then you can make it work. It changes things but it is up to the both of you to make those changes for the better.

    Answer by coala at 10:53 PM on May. 10, 2009

  • my husband and i had been married 4 yrs when we had our first. i was 23 still fairly young. but i don't think age has anything to do with it. you just have to work out things, find time to spend together after baby is asleep have movie nights at home etc...its hard to be spontaneous with a little one but as they get a little older its more possible. it does take work but it is definately possible, now that she is older (3) we get a hotel probably about every 6 months and she stays overnight with grandma and grandpa and she loves it and we get to go to dinner or just stay in and do whatever we want w/o a little person waking up or not eating or whatever it is. just keep doing the little stuff you do for each other and find ways to do other things (him wake up you sleep in etc..) and it'll work itself out

    Answer by vabchmommy at 10:55 PM on May. 10, 2009

  • It has completely changed my life and sex life. But I think everyone is different. I am 23 and having a baby completely changed me. I quit drinking and stay home for the most part. Now that it is getting warmer we get out more to cookouts and such but I am rather lame anymore. But my sex drive has dwindled to like nothing. I almost never want it and it makes me feel bad for my so. I think we just kind of got into a rut. It was just the same thing over and over ya know. But after I read the twilight books I wanted that passion back, so we have been working on it. Having a baby leaves you very tired all the time so it is hard. We love eachother to death, its just harder to find the time with both of us working. It takes work. Good luck.

    Answer by ashtonjames at 10:55 PM on May. 10, 2009

  • I think a lot of my issues is that I dont like my body anymore so I find it hard to try to be sexy for him with some of the spontaneous things we used to do.

    Answer by ashtonjames at 10:57 PM on May. 10, 2009

  • Yes, it completely changed things. Don't get me wrong, my fiance and I still love each other very much, but our focus has shifted. We are no longer the core of our worlds, our son is. I have grown to respect him as a partner and as the father of my child. We try to do things, go out and have a bit of fun, on the days my son sleeps over at my moms house. But we've come to find that most of the times all we want to do is pop in a dvd and veg out on the couch until we pass out! Being a parent is exhausting. Sex? We share a one-bedroom apartment, and our son is a busy little firecracker, so sex is the last thing on my mind right now. Maybe once we settle into things a bit more, we will figure out how to rediscover each other. I hope so.

    Answer by ShadesofGrey at 11:09 PM on May. 10, 2009

  • My husband said that he found me more beautiful and more attractive than ever before after we had a baby. Even though we were tired, we had more lust and more excitement in our lives. Before the baby it was sex, sex, sex. After the baby, my husband and I fell in love deeper than before and it made things more intense for us. We have 3 kids now, and it is still as sweet and romantic as the first. We love eachother more than we did before. We always find time to at least talk and be alone. Even if we never get out.

    Answer by krissyvelazquez at 11:39 PM on May. 10, 2009

  • Our motto is: Just because we become parents, does not mean we stop being husband and wife! We have date nights once a month, take a trip once a year just the two of us, and when our son goes to bed at 8pm everynight(yea we have a schedule) we spend time together whether it is watching our favorite tv show or some other activity we enjoy! HEHE

    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 11:57 PM on May. 10, 2009

  • Well, sex isn't that frequent as Before Baby... we don't go out and do karaoke nights like we did Before Baby... our married but childless friends have up and gone away, there is no more 'spontaneity' like it was Before Baby, such as taking small road trips for the weekend and things... um... that's about all I can think of

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:08 AM on May. 11, 2009

  • Yes having a baby does change things a lot...we have a 3 week 6day old son and right now we are struggling with sleeping all night, all the other stuff like sex hasn't even crossed our minds, when my husband is away from home at work or doing whatever I do manage to get everything done in the house while our son is in his swing or sleeping. For the most part we do manage to get a few naps a day when our son is sleep

    Answer by dbarkley101306 at 12:37 AM on May. 11, 2009

  • My daughter is a month and one week old. If I took any advice from anyone its even though I had a baby GO OUT! My husband and I went out to eat twice this week with her. We did go out once by ourselves. Even though were adults but we went to a carnival and rode the rides and just acted like kids, holding hand riding the ferris wheel. We were only out for 2-3 hours and my mil watched her.Sometimes we go for drives with our daughter listening to music singing and laughing. Also I know this may sound bad but SEX. We didnt wait very long to have sex again which even though it hurt it was very worth it I felt connected with him all over again. Our relationship has done nothing but improve with a child.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:44 AM on May. 11, 2009

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