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can someone act as the voice of reason for me?

okay well i have this friend on myspace, i've met her a few times through friends and stuff, well anyway her boyfriend and sons father is the scum of the earth, i cannot stand him. he left her when she was pregnant, didnt get back with her after his son was born, then got his new GF pregnant and left her for my myspace friend. my myspace friend talks shit CONSTANTLY about his pregnant ex on her myspace and one day i was in a bad mood and messaged her about it, told her to have compassion, shes alone and pregnant of course shes a bit crazy. she goes on to tell me that the girl is scandalous and that her now BF didnt even want the baby... i didnt say anything back but im thinking 'oh i didnt realize she raped him against his will...' and that he said the SAME thing about his son with my myspace friend. just what makes any baby more special? i wish i could reach out to pregnant girl but i dont know how, i dont know her last name


Asked by Anonymous at 1:16 AM on May. 13, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (10)
  • I am glad to hear that you are defending a girl you don't even know but you shouldn't get involved. Let your friend learn the hard way. You can talk till you're blue in the face but your friend ain't going to quit this guy till she get's fed up like the R. Kelly song says. You have a good heart but don't waist it on people who don't appreciate it.

    Answer by 214mommydearest at 2:34 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • i guess im just venting, and i know i shouldnt have said anything but i just feel so bad. poor girl didnt do anything wrong but get pregnant by a bad man.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:17 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • wait so she is talking trash about the woman who was put in the same situation as she was. by the same man, and now shes back with this man?
    that is what i'm understanding from your post, and if thats the case, i'd be reminding her of how she felt alone and pregnant and abandoned by the baby's dad

    Answer by vabchmommy at 1:19 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • yes exactly! i would but i know its not my place, but when i think about what she said i want to cry! i just dont understand how women can be so immature.

    i only said what i said because i was in a bad mood, usually i stay out of things. i just want to reach out to the poor girl who is pregnant and alone.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:22 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • Sounds like a lot of drama going on. I would remove myself from the situation and focus on my own child/life is these people want to spread theirselves so thin

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:28 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • You can't fix everyone. It took me years to learn that. God bless ya for your compassion though. I hope your heart doesn't get broken trying to fix anothers.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:29 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • i know anon :28 i feel you, if i wasnt in a bad mood that day i would never have messaged her and got involved, but after what she said it broke my heart... i just dont get how a mother could say that about another pregnant woman, ESPECIALLY when the woman is carrying her sons half sibling... i just dont understand.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:30 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • thank you SO much anon :29 it means a lot :] i do have to understand that! its a fault of mine

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:31 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • Have I died and gone back to a "hillbilly" 9th grade?

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:04 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • I think I would simply say to her that you understand where she's coming from, because she's trying to put her family back together, but that she, of all people, having walked a mile in this woman's shoes, should have more compassion. That you understand that he says he didn't want the baby, but then again, at the time, he said the same about her baby, and that maybe HE isn't the best person to listen to about what he said he wanted at what time...

    Then I would say that you value her friendship (assuming you do), but that you're disappointed to see this side of her, all things considered, and you don't want to discuss this other woman with her anymore.

    There's a good chance she will drop you as a friend, but honestly, do you really care if someone who is that heartless and lacking in compassion (and you only know through the computer) likes you or not?

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 3:25 AM on May. 13, 2009

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