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My four year old is cussing and acting up badly

So my four year old is cussing and acting really really bad but other times can be good he starts school this year though and I am worried. I know you can't spank him but he is getting out of control any ideas? When I say cuss I mean he would make a sailor blush and he is saying words his dad and I wouldn't even say

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Asked by Mom0f306 at 2:50 AM on May. 13, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (9)
  • He had to have learned that kind of behavior somewhere. Are you sure he didn't learn it from you or his dad? As parents we are the main example for our kids. They will do as we do.

    Answer by aprilmommy123 at 2:52 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • Why can't you spank him? Are you expecting the teachers to do something? OR do you want your kindergardener to be sent home?

    Answer by SusieD250 at 2:53 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • I agree with April. He HAD to have picked it up from someone close to him. Cuss words aren't instinctively learned.

    Spanking won't do much good. He will just be confused. It won't make sense to him that others can act this way and when he does it gets him in trouble. Be a better example to him. If you don't like him cussing then keep him away from it as much as possible. Ignore it when he does it. To him it is fun because when he says those words he gets a reaction and attention from people. Same with the other ways that he is "acting bad". Evaluate where he learned this behavior. Let him know you disapprove and it is not appropriate. Then drop it and give him no attention when he acts this way. Give positive reinforcement when he acts good.


    Answer by Anonymous at 3:00 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • Who told you that you can't spank your child? If my son were to speak that way to me there is an immediate reaction. He gets a spanking and is advised why that language isn't appropriate, won't be tolerated and if it happens again he will get another spanking. When the child is fully aware of the consequences and what WILL happen when he produces bad behavior then it will more than likely cease. If your son knows he can act this way and you won't do anything then it will continue. You need to nip it in the bud now or when he does start school you will be called to come pick up your child because that language isn't tolerated in the classroom. And the more he speaks that way, the more he will be home and not in school.

    Answer by lilbit022009 at 7:45 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • We don't spank because we believe that striking a child sends the message that sometimes hitting and violence are the solution to a problem; this does not fit with our world-view.
    Where did this kid learn this type of language? You need to remove the source and take away a toy or privelege every time he uses a "bad word"

    Answer by rkoloms at 8:15 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • when my child swears and after being told not to sa it he gets soap in his mouth or hot sauce. We dont have a problem with any bad words.

    Answer by IMAMOM2-2KIDS at 10:51 AM on May. 13, 2009

  • I actually have tried soap and hot sauce they worked but only temporary. Doctor actully told us in front of him that we cannot hit him and so he throws that in our face all the time. Thanks doc!! I don't like to spank him but does he really need to know that is not even an option. I think doctor's forget how smart 4 year olds are they treat them like they are still babies but the truth is they know what they are doing and the difference between right and wrong.

    Answer by Mom0f306 at 1:21 PM on May. 13, 2009

  • I don't agree with ignoring it when they curse. I told my kids those words were bad and that no one should be saying them and even if they hear me say it, to tell me I said a bad word because maybe I don't even realize I said one. And yes, they do call me on it once in a while (words like fat, stupid are bad words in our house too).
    I do spank and I don't mind the school or the dr's office knowing I do. I do not leave bruises or cause whelps or anything like that but I do get their attention. If you're not against spanking, then by all means, spank that backside, that's why it was made with padding.
    And yes, he will get sent home if he's cursing and I can guarantee that you're going to look bad as parents when he does and all of the other kids parents aren't going to like your child teaching them those words too. Mine came home saying a couple and I went up to the school and had a conniption fit because I had to explain

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 11:15 PM on May. 13, 2009

  • I will be honest. My son started picking up curse words, and I knew he got it from me. He kept repeating them because we kept reacting. Once we started ignoring the fact he said a curse word, he was done cussing in a week, literally. good luck!

    Answer by MyReason329 at 12:15 AM on May. 18, 2009

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