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Neglect?

My 10 y/o SS has ADHD and his mother decided he does not need his medication because she doesn't want to pay for it. We offered to pay for it but she still refuses. Since he has been off his meds, he has been failing school and has had to stay after school almost every day. Is this neglect? I think it is because she is stopping him from thriving.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:57 PM on May. 13, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (12)
  • yes it is medical neglect. report her
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:57 PM on May. 13, 2009

  • There are alternate ways of dealing with ADD/ADHD. The Feingold diet: www.feingold.org
    supplements, such as fish oil; and therapists who help people with attention issues learn to use them as a benefit: http://www.thomhartmann.com/category/thom/adhd-education/
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 8:24 PM on May. 13, 2009

  • Um, you don't HAVE to medicate a child for ADHD. It's not a life threatening illness like cancer.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:25 PM on May. 13, 2009

  • agree with rokloms and previous anon poster my child would never be put on adhd meds even if he had it i would treat it naturally rather than pump him up with meds i like my kid to have a personality and i would never want him walkin around like a zombie sorry i have seen way to many children who have had their spunk sucked outa them by adhd meds
    ilovemyboys21

    Answer by ilovemyboys21 at 8:39 PM on May. 13, 2009

  • No, it is not medical neglect. A parent of a child with ADHD is not required to medicate the child. My son has ADHD and is on meds because it was my choice after talking to his doctor, counselor and other parents. He is nowhere near a zombie. He went from failing school to making honor roll. If the meds are at the right dosage they won't be a zombie. But if ss mom decides not to medicate him, there is nothing you can do.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 8:41 PM on May. 13, 2009

  • Wow tyfry ..I actually agree with something you said. Who knew!!

    My 9 yr old has ADHD and it was 'suspected' when she was 3. I didn't think a 3 year old needed medication. It wasn't until she was 7 and failing school that I decided on medication. So yeah ...I waited several years for making that choice. Her last report card was one grade away from making honor roll - she had a B instead of an A. She is definitely not a zombie either and I told the doctor if it made her a zombie I'd stop giving it to her. When she takes her meds I feel like she can enjoy her childhood better. Example would be if we went to a museum without meds she'd be all over the place ..with meds she'd take the time to soak in everything. She loves that.

    With that said ...I gave it 4 years of a 'suspected' diagnosis to even act on it. Even after diagnosis the doctor said it was MY choice, and I think I even waited a few more months to think about it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:02 PM on May. 13, 2009

  • Mothers who don't have an ADHD or even an ADD child should not even reply with comments about what the would or would not do u haven't dealt w/it so u really don't know! if u don't have ADD or ADHD the meds won't help anyway and my daughter has turned into a better student happier child and considerate sister!
    I don't think there is anything u can do I know how much it helps I hope she changes her mind!!
    mommyhero

    Answer by mommyhero at 9:11 PM on May. 13, 2009

  • I agree with mommyhero. My son has been on ADHD meds since he was 7, and we went through many to get the exact meds and dosage correct so that he kept his personality and could control his impulses. ADHD is a chemical imbalance. We resisted medication for many years, even when he was failing classes and getting in trouble at school. We tried natural remedies, counseling, therapy, etc.... because I swore that I would not put my kid on meds. My son was so unhappy, and it was making all of us miserable. So we finally tried it, and it WORKED. He started excelling in school, could focus, could read a book start to finish, and his writing even improved! He is now 12 and is in gifted classes.
    Now I dont know if I would call it neglect not to give him his meds- its not necessary to live. But by not giving him alternatives to help him cope with his ADHD will hold him back from reaching his potential. JMO
    dragonfly7271

    Answer by dragonfly7271 at 11:44 PM on May. 13, 2009


  • "agree with rokloms and previous anon poster my child would never be put on adhd meds even if he had it i would treat it naturally rather than pump him up with meds i like my kid to have a personality and i would never want him walkin around like a zombie sorry i have seen way to many children who have had their spunk sucked outa them by adhd meds "

    My DS is on meds and he is the same child he is off his meds minus the jumping and anger and fidgeting.
    He has plenty of personallity , i thinks o medicate or not to medicate is personal choice and the same way i would NEVER say to some of you how dare you NOT medicate some of you really should stop pointing the finger at the ones who choose to medicate.
    For each time you point 1 finger at someone there will always 3 pointing back at YOU!
    I have went through a couple yrs of adjusting and changing to get the right fit and he says he feels normal but the "fog" is lifted.
    dita

    Answer by dita at 12:57 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • Well, not legally if that is what you mean. These things are the parents' decision. When the two parents disagree that is complicated but not a clear cut case of neglect or anything like that. If my child was having that kind of trouble, I personally would at least try medication but not everyone agrees. If it is really the money, why wouldn't she let you pay for it? Maybe she has genuine mixed feelings..... It is complicated and frustrating, but it can't really be called neglect.
    BJoan

    Answer by BJoan at 9:42 AM on May. 14, 2009

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