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Do you and your significant other sleep in the same bed?

My husband and I will be married for 11 years next month. We haven't slept in the same bed for like 9 years, and if we didn't I am sure we would be divorced by now. I am a VERY light sleeper, and my hubby snores VERY loud. Most men will stop snoring if they roll of their backs. Not my man, he snores on his back, both sides, and his stomach. When I first suggested sleeping in seperate beds he said no. Then I videoed him one night and he got to see how loud he is, and he agreed with me. When we sleep together niether of us sleep, because he keeps me awake snoring and I keep him awake trying to get him to stop. We have tried all these "cures" foe snoring, and nothing works. Those Breath Rite strips made him snore LOUDER. Some people may think it's bad that we sleep apart but it's best for us. But I would like to be able to sleep with him, it's just not gonna happen. Is there anyone else out there who sleeps apart?


Asked by TeriMelisa at 8:06 AM on May. 14, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (41)
  • I am so glad you responded to anonymous bc i was thinking the same thing CONCRDED what in the world does that have to do with what makes you happy shoot i havent even been married for 1 year yet and i kick my husband out all the time simply bc i sleep better.....

    Answer by mommylove112 at 10:44 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • umm no im not conceded enough to let that stop me from sleeping next to the one i love

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:07 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • We do sometimes, like last night I slept on the pull out couch. Its my choice not b/c my DH snores...well he doesn't, but I get so hot and uncomfortable and hate cuddling. I like to have the whole bed to myself.

    Answer by ABPeterson at 8:08 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • My Dad and his second wife NEVER shared a bed lol Not sure why though. If you are happy not sleeping with him and your relationship isn't suffering because of it then what you are comfortable with =)

    Answer by ShannonLeigh02 at 8:10 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • I was with mine for eight years and I just learn to sleep throw the snoring. I don't think that there is nothing wrong with you guys not sleeping together if it works. I wouldn't worry about what other ppl think about the two of you not sleeping in the same bed. If you guys are happy and it works why change something thats not broken.

    Answer by akmami0f4 at 8:11 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • Sometimes. My hubs is an early riser, I am a night owl. he snores, and if he is snoring I can't get to sleep. (I have even tried earplugs, but they did not work). Alot of nights I will be out in the livingroom and read/watch tv, and then fall asleep there. When I was sick last month I was considerate and slept in the livingroom- so my coughing would not bother him. (wish he would have done the same when HE was sick- cause now I have his stupid cold!).
    I think as long as it is something you both agree on and it works for you- whose business is it where you sleep?

    Answer by MizLee at 8:15 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • To anonymous at 7:07- it has nothing to do with being conceded it has to do with being able to sleep. I am so sorry that I need sleep. How does conceded even factor into it, I don't get that. I wasn't asking for anyone's approval I was wondering if anyone else was in the same situation.

    Answer by TeriMelisa at 8:25 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • I snore something horrible, tried everything, had surgery on my nose etc, and it's still bad. My Husband wears earplugs to bed, he insists that we never sleep in seperate rooms. I feel so bad for it but he say's the earplugs work.
    My sister's Husband snores really loud so she goes to bed before him so she's asleep before he gets in bed. That seems to work for them.

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 8:27 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • Married 38 years and still can't sleep through his snoring. Fortunately if I can get him to roll over onto his left side, it stops or at least isn't as loud. I have lost a great deal of sleep over the years trying to deal with the snoring. I have thought of separate rooms, but prefer to have him in the same room. Separate beds in the same room wouldn't help. I've tried running air cleaners and fans to drown out the noise. Earplugs aren't an option because I want to hear the alarm in the morning and also if there is anything else going on in the house such as the smoke alarm or something falling. The doctor gave him some nose drops for congestion that help a little bit. It is miserable to be fighting the snoring all night and then getting up tired. Do what you need to do to get a good night's sleep.

    Answer by Bmat at 8:31 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • We sleep in the same bed, but have separate blankets because I am a huge blanket hog. He'd have no covers if we tried to share. I know a couple (I work with her) who've been married 25+ years who sleep in separate rooms for the much the same reasons as you. It works for them and works for you, so who cares what some people think? Until they have to live in your body with your hubby, they really can't judge whats right for you (though they will try). I also don't see what conceit has to do with getting a good nights sleep. It's probably better you sleep apart and are happy during the day, than sleeping (ha) together and being miserable all day because you are exhausted.

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 8:34 AM on May. 14, 2009