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am so tired from my jealous

i feel jealous so much about my husband specialy that he works with pretty girls,,,i made so much problems for no reason about them,,and i watch him like dedactive,how he wear clothes or if he shave or i watch his cellphone like crazy,and i started make so much love ,which it make me feel so badddd coz its over my effort ,and he started to notice that,,,i feel so bad from my situation ,iam home most of the time thinking wat is he doing in his office,,iam tired and i wana feel free or at least relaxed,,,

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:47 AM on May. 14, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • You don't trust him! Or else you have no confidence in youself. He works with "pretty" girls and comes home to you nagging him about what he did at work, who he talked to, why he shaved, why he wore that, etc... Jealousy gets you no where in a marriage! So gain some confidence in yourself and start letting go of what you can't control. IMHO!
    mamaada

    Answer by mamaada at 10:51 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • make him feel the same way about you but not about your appearance more about your heart he fell for. If he cheats he still loses relax! You have to put his love to the test and then you will know.
    2mothershelpers

    Answer by 2mothershelpers at 10:55 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • been married for 25 yrs my thinking is you have to have a serious talk with him.see how he really feels.if he says ya so and so is attractive dont go crazy i would ask so would you ever be with her.but dont act mad because he wont answer you truthfully he will tell you what you want to hear.it may be just that they are attractive and thats it.my husband tells me woman he thinks are attractive and i tell him its kind of a long going joke.but that is it a joke...
    raineydays377

    Answer by raineydays377 at 10:55 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • Do you have a reason not to trust him? If you dont stop this will push him away. Find a hobby you like to do, take a college class work on you. He comes home to you every night. If you cant stop obsessing over it go in and talk to a therapist.
    okmommy08

    Answer by okmommy08 at 10:56 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • my personal experience: once i let my guard down with my husband and his assistants...he cheated and left me for his newest, and youngest, assistant. i was busy taking care of his sick step-father and he was screwing the little...well you know what i was gonna say. so, i would say trust your gut feeling.
    JessieK79

    Answer by JessieK79 at 11:02 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • I feel if you loved yourself you would not act the way you are acting..

    It also seems that you do not trust him..
    I would say that the problem is much more with you and your self esteem.

    I was very jealous in my 20's...I feel sorry for the boyfriends I had then...
    I have grown, grown to love myself for who I am....

    You need to start loving yourself, inside and out.....
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 11:14 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • I agree with most of the other ladies, unless you are a complete person on your own you could never be a complete half of a couple... so work on you, make yourself complete...
    I agree with taking a college class, even if not a college class find something you are into- a work out class, a dance class, an art class or cake decorating. It seems you may have too much time to think about what he may be doing. Unless he gives you reason to mistrust him don't push him away by acting like a criminal investigator after he comes home. You can talk to him and let him know that you just really care for him, and would hate to lose him, and that is why you worry so much, let him know you plan on backing off but you would really appreciate his support while you work through your issues... I too have jealous tendencies, I worked on me (just got a BA in education) and with DHs support I am over it. but I did need his support...
    LuckyClown

    Answer by LuckyClown at 11:24 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • Hi
    If you are not working you should even part time. This helps a lot. Secondly, I'd see a therupist so as to help you understand why you are like this. Perhaps you may already know the answer to that. However he is with you and you should always find a little time to look nice for yourself. You know, hair simply made, nails and pedicure. Stop snooping or you'll drive yourself crazy and him. He should have the best thing to come home to always. Be there for each other, talk, laugh, share, enjoy everything good and bad, problems at work etc. Find help now, before its too late. You don't want to push him away by your own doings, right?
    luna53

    Answer by luna53 at 11:55 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • right luna,, u r right,,listen iam crying from my self i wana love myself,, i wana feel that he loves me and he said so,,but still i can feel or forcing my minde to think that he likes the girl working with him,,,,iam driving my self crazy,,and he first told me that she is so beautifull ,now he is saying oh she is not,,,i feel just to mak e me take her away from my mind
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:04 PM on May. 14, 2009

  • Where my Dh works, he is constantly running into girls. They are always giving him their number. I know this because I have seen them. Usually he will throw them away or give them to his single friends. Sometimes they will make it home, but he throws them away or they get washed in the washer. I KNOW my DH loves me. i have looked at his cell phone before, just to see, but he has never called them and they have never called him. I trust him with all my heart, you need to giveyourself a break. You need to tell him how you feel, he will reassure you that it is you he loves. Not these "cute" girls at work. He may not even notice them. Give DH a break. He is coming home to you. Not some girl at work.
    krissyvelazquez

    Answer by krissyvelazquez at 12:58 PM on May. 14, 2009

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