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My marriage of 4 years is coming to a end

my husband told me last night that hes no longer in love with me,because we grew apart cause of the kids.wee were both absorbed doing our stuff we totally forgot about eachother.But im still in love with him,i begged him to try and work things out for the sake of my 2 small children,he said no.Im sooooo hurt right now and i dont know where to begin.has anyone's husband ever told them that and then came back to them?????

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:47 AM on May. 14, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • argh, that makes me mad- he wanted children too right? that is no reason to end a marriage and I am so sorry you have to go through this.

    LuckyClown

    Answer by LuckyClown at 10:48 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • he has some mental attachment issues

    2mothershelpers

    Answer by 2mothershelpers at 10:50 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • Sounds like he has some more reasons as to why its ending but is sparing your feelings. You need to now focus on you and your kids not wondering if he will come back. Thats a waste of time, emotions and energy. Believe me. If he sees you strong, not caring instead of clingy and depressed he may think diffrently in the long run. Let him go if it is meant to be it will happen.
    okmommy08

    Answer by okmommy08 at 10:53 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • u have to try to see if there is some girl in his life,,if not,,u have to try these days even if u r getting apart to stay with him ,or to try to give him attention,or to look pretty ,coz i can see u have no time for ur self,,try to fix this,its ur love,husband,, not boy friend ,, don't let him go away so easy,,but don't be angery ,just be beautifull,calm down ,,,and god help u
    mamishad

    Answer by mamishad at 10:58 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • but i am im practically begging him to pleaseeeeeee work things out.he swears there is no other woman that we just grew apart.i keep begging him.im losing my self.we didnt even try to work things out at all.hes leaving with out ever having tried for our marriage.Im scared and i feel helpless.He wants to stay living with me still until he finds something for himself.what now ???i just dont know what to do.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:03 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • Yupe X wanted out of the marriage...I, by myself try to keep the marriage..
    I have said this before and will say it again..
    THERE NEEDS TO BE TWO PEOPLE WANTING TO SAVE THE MARRIAGE
    for the marriage to be saved.
    Staying for the children is not the answer.
    And yes, after I cried a river or two, 8 months later he wanted us to be a family again..
    BUT guess what you move on, you grow, you learn from your mistakes, you learn to love yourself,
    you become independent, and you tell him to get lost....
    In the long run you will see that him leaving you, he actually did you a favor...
    Who wants a man that runs when the going gets tough.

    Let him go and take care of yourself and your children, You both deserve a strong, reliable
    man!
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 11:05 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • After having our first child, my husband felt I guess overwhelmed and decided he wanted out... I cried and beged him to stay.. I think I cried for a month straight after he left... one day I got out of my bed, got me a job, & called him & told him that I thought I was getting over him, that if he wanted to come see our son, to let me know so that I wouldn't be home... 1 hr later he was home and said he wanted to work things out... I said im sorry but I can't.. 5 months after that we got back together and this yr we celebrated our 14 yr anniversary!! GOOD LUCK! Im living proof that men do change!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:26 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • Hi
    I am so sorry you must be hurting very much. My husband used to threaten me with leaving me. I would cry silently or talk to my sisters. What I can tell you is this. You can't make or force him to love you. He is selfish because those children belong to both of you and he is behaving as if its all on you. I can tell you God is first. With him all things are possible and he will never let you down. Let me tell you alsothat when you are in a plane the first thing they tell you to do in case that something happens is get the air to yourself first so you can help another. Get up, dry your tears, get a job if you dont have one. Find a place for your chidren and see a lawyer if he is not willing to see a councelor with you to save your marriage. Being prepared and strong is the best advise I can give you. Find strength in the Lord! and be there for your children, Bless you!
    luna53

    Answer by luna53 at 11:38 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • yup dry ur tears,,.i know how much u r sad,,but go and stay with people loves u and can be patien with u ,like family and close friends,,and then change the house weather,,listen honestly ,,change in ur self a little,,don't do a romance dinner now coz it will be not natural,butlet ur kids be asleep whenever ur husband is home,,,sit with him with nice comfy look or appearance ,,, eat dinner with him normal,,,,let him feel he has family,,if he get out ,he will not be happy away,, now u have to sit a couple of hours alone,,and try to stay couple of hours with ur familyy,,and then with him,,,,stay with him
    mamishad

    Answer by mamishad at 11:53 AM on May. 14, 2009

  • Thank you luna as i read this and cry my heart out,i will find strength in the lord.Im trying to be strong for my kids,im in sooooo much pain.THank you for your words.I will take them with me and alwys remember that.thank you so much everyone.God bless you all.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:54 AM on May. 14, 2009

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