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Are there any adopted mothers that are experiencing the children going back to the birth mother?

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:49 PM on May. 16, 2009 in Adoption

Answers (13)
  • No, I don't have adopted kids but my sister does and I know it will be very difficult when this happens. Her son is 14 now.

    Answer by njt320 at 10:15 PM on May. 16, 2009

  • Not my own child but my best friend went back to live with her birth mother at 18. Long story short, she learned the reason why BM gave her up in the first place.


    Answer by dreyamom at 12:57 AM on May. 17, 2009

  • they normally don't stay gone long. They just need to find themselves and find it easier to do making that connection. Most get what they need from the birth parent and then go home to their "real" parents who reared them.

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:23 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • I certainly hope that "admckenzie" is right. Because I dearly love my daughter. I am hurt, but I can share her love, I just want her to love me too.

    Answer by lordsong1002 at 4:58 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • I can imagine it has to be so painful, but she is looking for part of her DNA. She will always love you always. Try to put yourself in her shoes.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:39 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • You know when I put myself in her shoes, I sorta understand, but I guess I am afraid that I'll never be a part of her life again. My friend adopted twins and when they were 18 they went back to the bm. But to my credit, she did say that she knew my daughter really loved me. But I really have trouble with her living with her bm. Maybe it's a DNA thing,,,,I hope so!!!!

    Answer by lordsong1002 at 8:17 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • Honestly this is partly why I dont adopt.

    I did read an artical in I think it was All You or Shape a few months ago where they followed three adoptive kids who found their birth parents. One got the original BPs back together, another lost contact again and another became best friends w/ the birthparents. So it can go any which way Im sure but you need to know whatever she does, you raised her and you're her mom.

    Answer by Praying at 5:12 PM on May. 20, 2009

  • I am 17 (12 days till i'm 18) and I wouldn't ever think of going to LIVE with my biological mom. Sure she's my biological mom, but she wasn't the one who raised me.
    Once i meet her i'd love to have a relationship with her, but i dont want to live with someone i just met basically.

    Answer by CamiiiCompasion at 6:25 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • Well, to add to the drama, my daughter came back to visit twice. I was glad to see her, but I was a little cautious of being hurt again.

    Answer by lordsong1002 at 8:14 AM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • Its not the same situation but i am glad you asked this question because my 2 year olds dad isn't in his life and my fiance has been raising him since he was 5 months.. One day i know he will want to find out who is "sperm donor" is and eventhough he's 2 i think about it all the time..

    Answer by LiSsY0924 at 6:58 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

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