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How to get over him cheating?

So my fiance' told me he was cheating on me a few weeks ago. He only seen the girl twice in person (once after he told me about her), but was talking to her for about a month. He travels with his job and met her in another state, and when he left they talked on the phone and threw text messages. Then he paid for her to come see him, so she drove across the country to see him. He said he started to feel guilty so he told me about her, and I got on the next plane to where he was. she was there when I got there, she arrived the same day only 6 hours before me. He told her he had to work things out with me and she left. He has stopped all contact with her, and he has been completely honest with me. Any questions I ask he answers, and he has seemed to take steps to prove to me that he wants this to work.We spent days together working on our relationship, I know I want to be with him but I just dont know how to get over this!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:15 PM on May. 17, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Counseling will help.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:17 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • I agree counselling. He needs to hear from a professional what his actions have done to you emotionally. He could just be have initial feelings of guilt right now. Without longer term counselling separately first and then together I wouldn't marry him. My husband after we were married cheated and having to deal with kids and a cheating husband's very very difficult and draining. Don't let that happen to you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:39 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • Well for one I wouldn't marry him........................not now or for a while! You are supposed to be in the "lovey-dovey" engagement stage anticipating life. He sounds like he isn't ready. Not only did he have a fling, he told you about it.. That in "man speak" screams "I'm just not ready for the responsibility yet!"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:02 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • Im surprised he had enough balls to tell you, thats good though... counseling like above posts have said. it actually does help if BOTH of you are willing to do the little excercise things that they ask. Other than that its gonna take a long time for you to rebuild that trust he's gonna have to be patient
    Breezy1988

    Answer by Breezy1988 at 2:18 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • If you both want to make the relationship work and get thru this, I agree with the above posters who suggested counseling. I hope all works out!
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 3:54 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • don't marry him. marriage doesn't make a cheater faithful.
    LilChynaDollie

    Answer by LilChynaDollie at 8:09 PM on May. 17, 2009

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