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Were your parents really strict when you were growing up?

If so, in what way were they strict?

Did it help you out?

Did it make you rebel against them?

Are you just as strict with your kids?
What is your relationship with your parents like now?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:29 PM on May. 17, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (11)
  • I thought they were. I wasn't allowed to stay the night with friends, I wasn't allowed to go to the movies, I wasn't allowed to have a boyfriend, I was given lots of chores on top of my homework...they kept me really busy. I cooked dinner, I cleaned the kitchen, my room, the bathrooms, and they were checked after I was done!! I never rebelled, I don't know why, but I guess I just had too much respect for my parents... Now I am glad that they were that way, it did probably keep me out of trouble. And my DD is only 3, so I am not that strict on her. I do timeouts when she doesn't listen, but I hardly ever spank her butt, the way my parents spank mine!!!

    Answer by pamelajqs at 7:33 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • They were sometimes very strict, and sometimes incredibly careless.

    It made for a very confusing childhood. I never knew who I was coming home to after school.

    I am going to try to give my daughter a more steadfast parent than my parents were.

    Answer by caitxrawks at 7:33 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • yes mine were very strict with me, my brother, and sister. as a kid i remember always being mad at my parents for not letting me do fun things. my whole life was about school and chores. i was never allowed to sleep at friends' houses and they were rarely allowed at mine. i lost alot of friends bc my parents were so difficult to deal with. it wasn't until i was 12 that i realized i could rebel against them. when i figured that out i rebelled in every way possible. alot of the bad things i did i wouldn't even hide because i wanted my parents to know that they had failed at raising me. i shoplifted alot, used drugs, and did a lot more stupid things. i would sneak out of my room all the time for years. i got pregnant at a pretty young age. i didnt love the guy, but i knew how much it pissed off my parents that i was dating a bad boy. my relationship with them isn't great now. we get along fine, but don't visit each other much.

    Answer by aprilmommy123 at 7:40 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • Oh yeah, and I'd like to add...yeah, I totally rebelled against them, especially my mom. She and I don't hold the same religious beliefs anymore, and it kills her every day that she didn't "raise me up right" according to her unattainable standard.

    Good thing my dad isn't like her.

    Answer by caitxrawks at 7:41 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • my sister and brother pretty much did the same things as me. they rebelled and got into a lot of trouble. my brother dropped out of high school just to spite my dad and mom. they are the same now too. they don't get into fights with my parents anymore, but don't really have a good relationship either.
    i am much more laid back with my kids now. i want to teach them the right way and let them make the choice. then when they make a poor choice they deal with the consequence.

    Answer by aprilmommy123 at 7:42 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • My mom was INCREDIBLY strict with our house being clean. She made it clear that it was HER house and she allowed us to live there. Growing up I always knew that my mom's house was much more important than I ever was. It didn't matter if I had gotten straight A's on my report card. If I had left my shoes on MY bedroom floor she would lose it and I got grounded. I guess this is what caused a lot of my self esteem issues. I didn't feel my mom really loved me as much as she loved her material things in her house. From 13 to the time I moved out at 18 I avoided eating food at home. I knew that any food I made just meant I had to immediately wash dishes, and scrub down the counters. So I just wouldn't eat when I was at home. I was so skinny to the point it was dangerous, but there were no dirty dishes for my mom to be mad about so she didn't care. Now that I have my own kids I would much rather have happy kids than a clean house.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:49 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • oh i also wanted to add that me and my siblings were all out of the house by the time we were 18 and never looked back.

    Answer by aprilmommy123 at 7:51 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • My mother used to do strip searches, room search, purse searches and more. One time she found a Maddona CD in my room and made me smash my entire collection with a hammer... The day of my 18th birthday, she sent me to a sitter because I couldn't be home alone for 4 hours.

    Did I rebel? Oh yeah, she has no clue! Drugs, sex, and more... I moved out less than a month after I turned 18 and never looked back. I never asked for help and never even told her I was leaving because she wouldn't have let me have my stuff...

    We didn't talk again til I had my kids, and now we only talk because she loves her grand kids...

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 8:45 PM on May. 17, 2009

  • My mom and step-father were strict to the point that they had expectations of us, but we also had a lot of free time to be children. We knew what it meant to work and earn things and we never had a lot of material things. Even though my step-father was abusive and hated me, my mom kept him in check and away from me as much as possible. When she died one of my brothers and I were sent to our genetic father whom we had never met before. He was extremely strict, hateful, and abusive. We had to clean the ceiling in the mobile home we lived in with straight ammonia to try to clean off the cigarette smoking color. We were made to go without meals for 2-3 days on end. Our clothes were always too small and out-of-date, making us the ridicule of school. We never had Christmas because we weren't worth it. Birthdays were the same. The state came and placed us in foster families when the physical abuse had been reported enough times.

    Answer by PrydferthMenyw at 9:05 AM on May. 18, 2009

  • >>>
    My foster family was nice to me at first, but their house was small and the state came in and told them I had to have my own room by state law. That meant that 2 of their own children had to share a room, which they resented. Once I turned 16 I went a got a job at McDonald's and was then told by them that they weren't paid enough money to buy me clothes or feed me so I had to buy all my clothes, food, and anything else I wanted. They did treat me decent at Christmases and my birthdays. They even found my other brothers, who my bio father wouldn't allow us to see, and she brought them over so we could visit and get acquainted again. Our relationship with each other was never the same though before our mom died.
    Once I graduated high school (I was an excellent student!) and left for college, they took all my belonging out of their home and sent it to my grandmother's house without letting me know. I was hurt.

    Answer by PrydferthMenyw at 9:10 AM on May. 18, 2009

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