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My daughter is breaking my heart. She wants to be at friends' homes, and not her own. I'm hoping to get past this soon. When I was a teen, my family played games together, or did puzzles. My kids aren't very willing to play games with me. Does anyone have any ideas for me?

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hardjourney

Asked by hardjourney at 1:41 AM on May. 18, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

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Answers (9)
  • Make a game night every week or atleast once a month and make it just for family some nights and let her invite friends one night but make it maditory and you are the parent so set boundaries and if you think she is going to much put a limit on how often she goes being gone from home alot is not healthy
    abbibaileylily

    Answer by abbibaileylily at 1:45 AM on May. 18, 2009

  • **sigh** Sadly, I feel more sympathy for your daughter. I too was always out of the house as a teen; I felt like I'd spent plenty of time at home. So I had my after-school activities, my weekend job and time spent with my friends. There were a few things that remained inviolate: Sunday afternoon dinner and watching the 11 PM news and Johnny Carson with my dad at night.

    Find out what your kids ARE interested in. Then see what you can share with them. Games may be too "geeky" for them. DON'T PUSH. You'll end up shoving her away.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 1:47 AM on May. 18, 2009

  • What are your kids interests? We used to have game night too. Could be that your time with your DD is going to get pedicures or going to the movies.
    Keep in mind that kids are embarassed by their parent's at this age. I still remember being mortified of my mom when I was 12! My word she could do nothing!
    Maybe you could make your house more accessable for your DD and her friends.
    AmandaH321

    Answer by AmandaH321 at 1:48 AM on May. 18, 2009

  • i'm with qdiamante on this one. don't push. i also was a teen that HATED, i meand HATED being at home. it wasn't my dad (parents divorced), it was just that i found it boring at home and there was nothing to do. even when i had friends come over, we would find stuff to do but i always wanted just to get away from the house. i felt like i was always there and was tired of it. it was the same way for my friends. they prefered to come to my house, i prefered to go to their house. we all just wanted to stay away from home unless we absolutely had to be there. it's just a teen thing. and also it's embarrassing to have your parents there while you're hanging out with friends. that just comes with being a teen i guess.
    armywife43

    Answer by armywife43 at 2:01 AM on May. 18, 2009

  • teens will be teens and are trying to explore the world, hopefully they will make the right choices but for now you should make sure that she knows that you are here for her and always willing to listen and not just be the parent. the best way to keep her home more often is to make it fun for her friends. if her friends like u and feel more comfortable instead of her leaving, ur house will be the kids get away.
    ProudMammaMia

    Answer by ProudMammaMia at 3:20 AM on May. 18, 2009

  • Im the same way. You probably annoy her a lot and she doesnt want to be home and be nagged all the time. I hate staying home, my parents piss me off because they have morals that clash with mine, they have no common sense, and they are just plain old annoying. That may be the case, leave her alone for a while, maybe she will come home.
    MammaBella

    Answer by MammaBella at 8:18 AM on May. 18, 2009

  • Lots of good advice, and I'd add that I bet you are talking about a young teen - 'cause I too was surprised how my teens just don't do or like what I think they should. The sooner you get over it, the better for you - and for them. Go with the flow, and support your daughter in whatever it is she likes and wants to do - as long as she is happy, thriving, etc.

    She might not like games and/or hanging out with you. I'd give her chances to have friends over - suggest taking her and a friend to a movie and having her invite the friend to stay over, etc. Give her some space, but indirectly you get to know her friends while in the car, at meals. See, maybe if it goes well, she'll have more over. And if not, don't take it hard... just go with the flow. If you can, take a vacation... without other distractions, she might just be willing to 'play games' with you.

    And maybe you should look for a games club....
    PhillyinFrance

    Answer by PhillyinFrance at 9:33 AM on May. 18, 2009

  • Games are your thing, not theirs. You need to find an activity that you can do together. Is your teen interested in the enviroment? Then join a park cleanup. Is your child an animal rights person? You can volunteer at an animal shelter. Does she love to read? Find a mother/daughter book club. You need to bend a little here.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 11:09 AM on May. 18, 2009

  • Animal rights and vegetarianism are her things. I haven't been able to give up meat. I could certainly do something for animals with her... THANKS EVERY ONE FOR ALL THE GREAT ANSWERS!!! btw, who would a games club be for, me, or the whole family?
    hardjourney

    Answer by hardjourney at 11:28 AM on May. 18, 2009

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