Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How can I get my daughters father out of her life?

My daughter is 2 1/2 and just the biggest buddle of joy. She has this "thing" called her father that is just a complete pile of crap. He use to beat me constently and finally after he did it right in front of her I finally decided enough is enough. I left and got an OFP against him. We went to court the judge asked if I wanted child support, I was awarded 125.00 per week under the condition that I would give him visitation that is to be supervised. That was almost a year ago and I still have not seen a dime. He has brought me to court for content against visitation, the aggreement was at a safety center which would cost us 120.00 per time per parent.well with getting no money from him I couldn't afford it so we went back and had set up drop offs with his siter they take her fri nt- Sun nt but they cancell or don't call for months or call at 7 fri when they are to get her at 6. I feel it's not fair to her at all to go through

Answer Question

Asked by morgansmama06 at 4:43 PM on May. 18, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • The agreement was for him to get visitation if he paid his child support, so the agreement should be off because he doesn't pay child support, so you shouldn't have to give any kind of visitation. Just go to them and tell them you won't grant him any visitation anymore because of the agreement.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:47 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • If he's her biological father, you and her are stuck with him unfortunately. But you should document all the crap he puts you through and take him to court. Tell the judge he never pays child support or sees her like he's supposed to and see if you can get the visitation shut off. Sounds like he doesn't give a crap anyways about seeing her. Ask him if you let him off the hook about the child support if he'll drop the visitation, that may be the only way to get him out of her life for good.

    Answer by Indygirl18 at 4:50 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • I agree if he was coward enough to hit you, how can you be sure he isn't doing anything else to your child? If he isn't paying child support, go back to the judge and tell them that you want his visitation privileges revoked because no amount of money is worth having if the price to give access to that "monster" to your child. He doesn't deserve to be near your child, period.

    Answer by bebita at 4:54 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • haul his butt back in for contempt on the child support. You could have him sever his parental rights.

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:54 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • I know that he doesn't fight in court of her because of her. If he truelly cared ans was going to be a good father i wouldn't mind as much. He does this to me because he knows it hurts me to have to have her go and see him. I have recently gotten married to the most womderful man he wants to adopt her so badly. She calls him daddy we have our happy family. But when we have to drop her off with her other gene pool she crys and kicks and screams.Then when she gets back she is so naughty for 3 days. She will not listen and is just a brat. She is never like that when she doesn't go over there. It has been almost 2 months since she has been there and she is just been an angel. it hurts so much to do this but he has already brought me to court for contemt. GGRRR it makes me so mad!! I just feel helpless!!!

    Answer by morgansmama06 at 5:10 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • He won't do anything that will actually be good for her. He has violated his ofp over 6 times and nothing ever happens to him. I have had to move 3 times!! He is not doing her any good!! i do not trust him with her and would like nothing to do with him in any sort of way. why can't people like this just go away? I feel like just because you are a part in making a child don't be so selfish and ruin someone else's life just because you suck at life!! does anyone else have any issues like this?

    Answer by morgansmama06 at 5:15 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • He was good enough for you to sleep with and procreate with. You made a conscious decision to continue with your pregnancy and now you will have this man in your life until your daughter is 18 unless he relinquishes his parental rights. Child support and visitation are not linked. I will repeat that. Child support and visitation are not linked. In the court's eyes he can never pay CS and still see his child. The opposite is true as well. You could withhold visitation and he would still have to pay CS. I am sorry he is such a pain but that is the price you have to pay for your DD. Document all the missed pickups and anything else and hit him with contempt. Again, you are in for a rough ride but these are the consequences of sleeping with someone who wasn't a good person.


    Answer by lilangilyn at 5:28 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • He was never like that when I met him. He didn't start to get that way till I told him I was preg. I understand that it isn't linked but I am just looking out for my daughters saftey!! she does not deserve to ever go throught what I went through and she should not have to pay for my mistake. she is in a very loving home now and going to see her real father does nothing but screw her up!!

    Answer by morgansmama06 at 6:10 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • and further monre abortion is not a form of birth controll so just because I decided to make "a conscious decision to continue with your pregnancy" I want nothing but the best for her!! she is my whole world and I will do anything to protect her!!

    Answer by morgansmama06 at 6:13 PM on May. 18, 2009

  • You agreed to the visitations for the child support (never heard of that before but I have no reason to not believe you). Maybe go back and relinquish the visitation and give up the money? I don't think he's going to give up that easy tho, but you can go in and request more money and maybe he'll sign over his rights so you can let your hubby adopt her.
    My friend's ex had supervised visitation but they had a mutual friend to be the one to volunteer to be there to make sure nothing happened to the child (well till he went to prison for violation of his probation).

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 6:59 PM on May. 18, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.