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am i wrong for not letting my ex see our daughter? the reason y i told him that she could not go to see him everyother weekend is cause the last time he had her it was stil chilly out and he had her out side with nothing on except for pants. Also he had his friends over drinking and let one of his girl frinds put hoop earrings in her ears when i said no. Mind you my daughter is 21 months now and she was only 19 months when all this happend.


Asked by mamaoneil at 2:48 AM on Jun. 21, 2008 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (8)
  • I don't think so... he sounds like he needs to grow up quite a bit. I would have been absolutely fuming if some girl even touched my daughter let alone putting earrings in her ears after you already said no.

    Answer by maddiesmomma619 at 3:16 AM on Jun. 21, 2008

  • forbidding a wanting father to see his child IS wrong so try talking to him. Hopefully he can think logically ...hoops can be riped out,drinking canneed to be done at another time, send the complete outfit If he doesnt get these things then dont leave her with him but let him see her but make an hour or to where you are close by. Teach him if he is willing to learn it will be best for your child!!

    Answer by vidasmama at 3:36 AM on Jun. 21, 2008

  • Perhaps you should try supervised visitation. In a lot of cases, you can get an order for a court mediator. In the long run, maybe he will learn how to appropriately care for and act around your daughter. If he doesn't seem to be learning, at least you will know that you are doing everything you can. If she can have some sort of bond with her father, she will most likely have more self confidence and be more acceptable to change.

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 3:45 AM on Jun. 21, 2008

  • i should have been more clear when i wrote this question. I will not allow him to take our daughter every other weekend. He can still come to nh and see her for a day here.

    Answer by mamaoneil at 4:02 AM on Jun. 21, 2008

  • I would not allow him to see her without another you trust with him. I think what you are proposing with is an acceptable response to his behavior.

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 2:01 PM on Jun. 21, 2008

  • He sounds like a kid himself, the supervised thing sounds good. Is there anyone in his family maybe who you trust and would sit there with him and make sure he doesn't do all that stuff. Also, he needs to know, that as the childs mother and main carer, you have final say in things like earrings so he must always withour fail ask you first!!

    Answer by MeAndLo at 3:11 PM on Jun. 21, 2008

  • it is wrong to keep him from his kid,however if he wanted he could go to court and get visation,which is probaly better and then you can express your concerns with the judge like i did and she made the order as follows: visation ok but must be agrred upon both parties the time,place,and how long good luck!

    Answer by kimsboys at 5:38 PM on Jun. 21, 2008

  • I think you should let him try to earn your trust back maybe with short unsupervised visits. Maybe just an hour or two until you know he can be responsible.

    Answer by BELLITASMOM at 10:40 PM on Jun. 25, 2008

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