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Husband's Consent Is Needed for What?!?!?!

Do you think if you are married, that your husband's consent should be needed in order for you to be an egg donor?
I personally believe that since you sign away your rights to any child that might be born as a result of your eggs, that it doesn't affect my husband and therefore his consent shouldn't be needed. My husband does not control what I can and cannot do with my body, with the exception of if I am impregnated with a child by him. I wouldn't expect that my consent be needed for him to be a donor at a sperm bank, and I would expect that right would be afforded to me as well.
What are all of your thoughts?

 
2-1CavWife

Asked by 2-1CavWife at 9:20 PM on May. 19, 2009 in Politics & Current Events

Level 1 (3 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (40)
  • Yeah, and where I live if you want a hysterectomy you have to have your husband consent to that as well. But he doesn't need your consent to have a vasectomy. Very backwards. I think it is crazy that a woman who is an adult needs the permission of anyone to donate her eggs. Whether it is for science, for another couple trying to get pregnant...it is her right to make informed decisions and seek support from those she chooses to share with. You would think a married woman would tell her partner about something like this. Of course that would be an assumption. But even if she doesn't that still doesn't mean she needs to get permission. it may mean she has a not so solid relationship. But it doesn't mean she needs a man to make up her mind for her. Funny how if a lesbian were donating eggs her female partner doesn't have to give consent.  I guess only a man knows how to make the right choices about a woman's eggs.

    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 9:28 PM on May. 19, 2009

  • That is the weirdest thing I've heard. that doesn't make any sense.....
    ajguinn

    Answer by ajguinn at 9:23 PM on May. 19, 2009

  • My opinion? Ok, I don't think a husband's consent should be 'required' but at the same time, I couldn't imagine doing something medical like to my body without discussing it fully with him and without his full support. I mean, this is a medical procedure and if something goes wrong he would be the one to deal with me. Also, if a baby resulted from my donation then that baby might one day look for me when they become an adult. This could impact his life as well...just like if a child that resulted from his sperm donation came looking for him. So often we forget that in our zeal to give people cute babies that these babies will one day be adults with questions about where they came from and finding those answers can turn the biological provider's life upside down...for better or worse.
    mizkaye

    Answer by mizkaye at 9:24 PM on May. 19, 2009

  • I would want his support...I mean geez, he's probably looking at it as "that could be my kid", but you're giving the chances away to someone else...I wouldn't do it without my husbands support, not approval, support...I dunno, kind of a weird question....
    calliesmommie

    Answer by calliesmommie at 9:25 PM on May. 19, 2009

  • That makes no sense at all... so the law is saying any eggs we have belong to our husbands? What the hell... you know they really should tell you that crap when you go to get married, kwim? :/
    Gremlyn

    Answer by Gremlyn at 9:26 PM on May. 19, 2009

  • Aww man. You know I would have to say yes on this one even though I am all for women s rights. I believe that when you get married you are one and you should make all important decisions together. This is a tricky one especially for all those women that are in bad marriages and have rotten husbands that they definitely wouldn't want to procreate with again. lol. No the husbands consent should not be needed. But if everyone's marriage was ideal there wouldn't be a rule for it.
    Tickledtrauma

    Answer by Tickledtrauma at 9:26 PM on May. 19, 2009

  • I personally would expect to have my husbands permission and he, mine if he was donating. When we married we made a commitment to each other and what is mine is his and his is mine! Any children I may have or someone with my eggs-well they are his too. I am not saying I think that should be the law! But in my house that is how it would be between hubby and I.
    micheledo

    Answer by micheledo at 9:27 PM on May. 19, 2009

  • mizkaye I completely agree with you about respecting your spouse enough to inform them of what you are doing, especially because of the support issue and emergency issues.
    I would be interested in seeing the stats for how many children come looking for parents that are donors. I think it is probably pretty small. First of all it is completely confidential. You are not even looked at like a parent, I think it is a little different than children that have been through adoption agencies or where born from a surrogate.
    2-1CavWife

    Answer by 2-1CavWife at 9:28 PM on May. 19, 2009

  • Yes. I do think he should have a say in it. Your basically having kids with other people, he should have a say in it. Wouldn't you want to have a say if he ere donating his sperm. Would you really want other women having his babies? I know I wouldnt.
    abbynzachsmommy

    Answer by abbynzachsmommy at 9:31 PM on May. 19, 2009

  • I agree with all of you ladies, you want to have that mutual respect for one another because you are right, you are one when you get married. I just find it unsettling to think that anyone else could have the final say in something that is being done with my body in regards to donating reproductive cells. I mean would you expect that you husband's permission would be needed to donate blood? It could end up saving a life, and that person could try to find you as well. If we give control to our spouse over one aspect of our body, what is to stop it from all aspects?
    2-1CavWife

    Answer by 2-1CavWife at 9:32 PM on May. 19, 2009