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i dont know what to do...

im torn between two guys. i need some advice. this is drama and i want it to end!! there is this guy that i met and he is wonderful. a lot has happened. he has cancer (found out two days after we met). when we started dating he wasnt showing everything he had to offer (his feelings) bc he was afraid that i'd get too close and he wuld die. well at times his true feelings wuld show and i fell in love! but then he wuld back off and shut down. so then i would start thinkin bout my ex. we were on and off. i finally broke it off cuz i didnt feel the connection. well it was his way out and he wanted me to distance myself so he like WENT OFF! it was bad. but he later told me after i bugged him cuz i knew it was weird. he told me the truth bout the cancer and why he did it. the meantime...i booked a ticket to go visit my ex. bad idea i know. they are BOTH fighting for me. its horrible. well the first guy sent me..CONTD below

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:11 PM on May. 20, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • CONTD....message saying he wuld be so hurt if i went ahead and got on the plane to see my ex that if i came back to him he probably wouldnt take me back. we felt so much connection those few times he showed his love for me. but i dont know how to just NOT go see my ex. we were working things out. then that other guy comes along to tell me the truth. i feel like if i dont go see my ex (he previously booked a ticket to come see me and i told him not to come) then i will always be wondering and i wont be able to focus on the next guy. but if i do go....i may lose someone that could potentially be my soul mate.

    what would you do in this situation??

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:14 PM on May. 20, 2009

  • I say do not take the trip BUT also dont choose the cancer guy. Right now take a couple weeks to figure out what you want. tell them both you need to be alone for a little bit to work it out for yourself. The one who backs off to allow you to do that is the one to pick. Love means wanting the persoin to be happy, even if you may be hurt by that happiness. So the guy that says"I love you enough to let you go figure out what you need" is the one to pick.

    Answer by Bearsjen at 11:17 PM on May. 20, 2009

  • Ex's suck. They dont change. If you like the new guy better try to see what happens with him.

    Answer by BrittanyD07 at 12:32 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • The ex is EX for a reason. Remember that reason.

    Then spend some time getting to know YOU without a man. It'll help you figure out what you really want and you will NEVER have this "torn between two lovers" issue again.

    Answer by gdiamante at 1:14 AM on May. 21, 2009

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