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marriage issues

My husband and i have a beautiful one month old little girl that i wouldnt trade for the world.Ever since she was born my husband hasnt had very much patience with her,he'll hold her and if she starts to fuss he'll pass her off.He doesnt get up with her during the night and I've told him several times how i feel but we always fight and says he'll change and I havent seen any improvement yet.I need some advice please

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alaina_20

Asked by alaina_20 at 11:16 PM on May. 20, 2009 in Relationships

Level 7 (151 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Usually it takes the men a while to feel comfortable around the baby. My husband didn't start helping out until our daughter was at least 3 or 4 months. Now that she can play, he likes to help out more.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:18 PM on May. 20, 2009

  • My x wouldn't hold any of our kids until they could walk on their own! Some men just don't like being around little babies for fear they might drop them or break them!
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:21 PM on May. 20, 2009

  • I've noticed that many men don't handle the crying very well. He may feel embarrassed when she cries, like he is doing something wrong. Let him know it is normal for a baby to cry. Just because she is crying doesn't mean he is doing something wrong. Tell him she cries with you all the time and you gotta try to comfort them and you have to tolerate it. Passing her off isn't going to help her become accustomed to him. Tell him the more he holds her and comforts her the more she will be easily comforted by him. My man never gets up in the night to help but I breast feed so he doesn't really need to. But I will ask him to change the diaper first thing in the morning.
    Tickledtrauma

    Answer by Tickledtrauma at 11:26 PM on May. 20, 2009

  • It is not abnormal. Men are not as nurturing as women. He will get more comfortable with time, don't worry.
    army_wife2000

    Answer by army_wife2000 at 11:41 PM on May. 20, 2009

  • I agree some dads aren't comfortable around babies. They need guidance from moms on how to care for babies. Some guys would rather wait until babies are a little older for fear of how small babies and helpless they are. It doesn't mean he does not love the baby he's just unsure of himself. Be patient and help him bond with the baby. He will come around much quicker if you are calm about it and are patient with him.

    susan6xblessed

    Answer by susan6xblessed at 11:48 PM on May. 20, 2009

  • He;s just being a normal new dad. Let him be. It takes them time to get used to a baby.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 1:09 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • I dont know how your husband is but my husband gets downright mean when our kids cry he gets in my babies face and actually screams at him and we have two and he has never changed I actually have thought about leaving him because of this he is an ass
    MoMMyto2971

    Answer by MoMMyto2971 at 7:41 AM on May. 21, 2009

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