Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Why is it bad to have more than on baby shower? When is it okay?

Just wondering. Example my DH isn't DD biological father so his family wasn't there for my first shower. If i got pregnant would it be rude to want a shower. Or if someone had a girl and then a boy could they have two?

 
amommy2a2yrold

Asked by amommy2a2yrold at 10:58 AM on May. 21, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 8 (241 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (19)
  • every baby deserves to be celebrated! i have no problem with people having a shower for each baby. the only thing that i think is tacky, is when they throw one for themselves... it's like saying... "hey, buy me stuff"
    abelsmama07

    Answer by abelsmama07 at 11:03 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • My family is having another one for me. I have all boy things from last time, and I'm having a girl. I don't think it's rude!
    ajguinn

    Answer by ajguinn at 11:01 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • I don't think people usually have more than one shower, but that's up to you, you don't have to fallow the norm, if you feel like in your situation you want another one go ahead.
    Liz132

    Answer by Liz132 at 11:03 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • I had two showers and since my DH was deployed he wasn't at any of them. One was thrown by the coworkers from my old job, and my co workers from my new one came. Then my MIL threw me one while I was in Tennessee, and my grandmother, mother, aunt and her family came. I don't think I will have any showers for my second, although I know my MIL will probably throw me one. I think it is assumed by most people that you have things left over from the first child (I bought neutral for the first), and that you are more stable and prepared when you have your second child. Perhaps your husband's family will throw you one since its a new grandbaby in their family. I think that would be fine.
    2-1CavWife

    Answer by 2-1CavWife at 11:05 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • What I've always been told is that if you have a boy or girl and then your next is the opposite then a baby shower is okay but if you have like two of the same sex back to back then Why do you need a baby shower??? But if enough time has past between the two kids who are the same sex ( IDK how long) then it's okay to have a baby shower.

    But in my case if I have another boy and we live in a different area...I'm probably going to have a baby shower. I mean, I'll have new friends. Why not...
    Dayija

    Answer by Dayija at 11:06 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • I was thrown showers by people who mentioned that they were thinking about throwing one. I didn't expect anyone to. I had 1 with my first child (from a previous marriage) and then with our twins 3 different people mentioned throwing showers. So I had 3 with our twins. My sister did one and invited family and friends. Another friend mentioned it, so I did her's as the people from work, and then another friend mentioned having one but for males and females shortly after DH returned from Iraq. We did a "diaper dinner" where we just had basically a potluck and couples were invited and everyone brought a pack of diapers. That was the only way my DH was going to set foot in a baby shower. Anyway, I think I would see if somebody mentions it, but I don't see why this baby shouldn't be celebrated just the same. If no one mentions it, maybe you could throw a meet the baby party after the LO arrives.
    mommystiebler

    Answer by mommystiebler at 11:09 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • It is up to your friends & family. If they want to throw you a shower, they will. In my case, I had a shower given by church friends with my first DD. But then it was 8 years, a marriage (not to DD's father), & I was having a boy the second time around. So, my DH's family threw me a shower. 17 months later, I had another girl but no shower for that one. But she was born a month after Christmas so everyone got her Christmas presents, lol.
    funnyface1204

    Answer by funnyface1204 at 11:14 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • It's really up to you if you want to have a shower for each baby. Different circumstances call the occasion. I have a little girl right now who is 5 months old, so if I get pregnant soon with a little girl, I most likely wouldn't have a baby shower. But if I had a little boy, I would, because I don't have anything for boys. Now if it were a few years down the road and I didn't have baby stuff anymore, I would have a shower whether it was a boy or a girl. It's all up to you, really. This is just my opinion.
    srhmldndo

    Answer by srhmldndo at 11:21 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • If your family and friends want to throw you a baby shower for each pregnancy, that's great. But it is wrong to expect someone to throw a shower for each pregnancy, or to plan one yourself for each pregnancy.

    It is customary to only have a shower with the first child, and possibly a second shower if it's been many years since you had a child. I can see why someone would want a second baby shower for a child of the opposite sex from the first baby. But really, if you get neutral colors, all your baby gear would suffice for either sex and you would only need clothing.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:27 AM on May. 21, 2009

  • There's a difference between having more than one shower for the first baby, and having more showers for more than one pregnancy/baby.

    If people give you multiple showers for your first pregnancy, great!!!

    Proper etiquette is that you are given a shower for your first. If it has been more than 5 years since the last baby, then it is considered "okay" for another shower to be given. It is never considered okay for you to give a shower for yourself or to ask someone to give one for you. A shower is also not supposed to be hosted by either your mother or your mother-in-law. I believe they shouldn't be given by yours or your husband's sisters, either...but I'm not sure about that one.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:43 AM on May. 21, 2009