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What method of sleep training do you recommend?

My baby will be 1 next week. She still doesn't sleep thru the night. she wakes up multiple times and I HAVE to get up and pick her up or she will not go to sleep. I did have this problem with my older 2, but not as severe and they were over it by 9-10 months of age. I was willing to try CIO, but DH is completely against it. I feel that by 12 months there is NO reason to NOT be sleeping. I would understand and feel differently if she were sick or even hungry. She's not, she just wants me to pick her up, put her on my shoulder and she is back asleep within 5 minutes. But I WANT SLEEP!!! I haven't had a full nights sleep since before she was born.

So please give advice as you see fit. I am open to any and all suggestions. Tell me what worked for you and how long it took to "work".



Asked by ratchetlee at 9:05 PM on May. 21, 2009 in General Parenting

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This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • It really depends on what sort of parent you are and what your philosophy is. I don't think any one method is better than any other. What makes it successful is that you believe in what you are doing and follow through with it. I recommend at the very least reading The No Cry Baby Sleep Book. It's very informative and asks you to take a look at your current routine and how you can alter it to make things move more smoothly. There is no one method in there, it is mostly a list of suggestions to take or leave.

    Answer by beckcorc at 9:16 PM on May. 21, 2009

  • i'm also reading the no cry sleep solution. my 19 mos old still needs me at night. it's normal for a 1 yr old.

    Answer by jus1jess at 9:23 PM on May. 21, 2009

  • Yes, it may not solve all of your problems, but it may answer some questions. And if there is anything simple you can adjust like an earlier bed time or more regulated nap times then it's worth it!

    Oh and yes, very normal for a baby to wake up at night even at this age.

    Answer by beckcorc at 9:29 PM on May. 21, 2009

  • I recommend neither CIO nor Co-sleeping/Attachment Parenting. I recommend custom parenting.

    Do what you feel is right at the moment that it's right for your child. My son would not sleep through the night 0-6 weeks. So I was holding him every time he cried and he slept in a bassinett by my bed. 6-12 weeks, he slept in his bassinett through the night. 12-22 weeks, he stopped sleeping through the night and was too big for the bassinett, so he slept in bed with me. I also practiced every couple of nights, then every other night and then every night putting him in his bed for a little while and then going and getting him when he would cry. I wouldn't go running in there when he started crying, in case he just needed to settle himself. Eventually at 22-24 (which is how old he is now) he started sleeping through the night in his own crib.

    It took a lot of hard work and was tiring (cont.)


    Answer by NovemberLove at 9:37 PM on May. 21, 2009

  • (cont.) but I refused to let him scream and cry AND I also refused to give in and baby him instead of encouraging him to try new things. He has established a love and comfort for his crib and knows I'll be there for him if he calls.

    I get so irritated when people advise that you do one thing or another. AP/Co-sleeping sounds nice but if your baby enjoys his crib and the freedom to roll around (he's a kicker and roller like my husband), let him in his crib for crying out loud. For the CIO-ers, if your kid is near to having a stroke because he's been crying for so long, pick him up. No one thing works for everyone all the time.

    Answer by NovemberLove at 9:42 PM on May. 21, 2009

  • Every single child sleeps differently. I am a pro-BF, co-sleeping mother--for the most part. My 4 year old didn't sleep until he stopped nursing at 28 months while my 22 month old has been sleeping all night in his crib from 12 months on, still nursing but not at night. He could not co-sleep, he would not settle down so close to me. We tried the crib (with me sobbing) and since that first night, it's been 10 hours of sleep per night. He never cried, not once. My oldest child was that wonderful baby who you could just lay down in her crib from 6 months on--no crying, nothing, just sleep!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:02 PM on May. 21, 2009

  • I agree with what Dr. Sears says, that it's natural for children to need to be "parented" to sleep. MOST will not naturally put themselves to sleep, they dont' know how, some lucky few do. It is normal for 1 year olds to still wake at night. I am completely against CIO. Read more of dr.sears website on sleep training to understand why some of us feel that way. He can also give you advice on how to deal with this. I believe you should do whatever the child needs- within reason, sometimes bad habits are formed that need to be broken- but things along the lines of rocking, back patting, nursing, singing, ect. are normal and natural ways to get them back to sleep. I personally co-sleep and that way we all get more sleep, my babies always sleep good because they are next to me and that works best for us. I didn't believe in it until I had my first dd who wouldn't sleep alone and I learned more about it,now I believe it's healthier.

    Answer by Chick at 11:54 PM on May. 21, 2009

  • I agree fully with Chick above. My DD is 7.5 months but I will be waiting until SHE is ready, not when I am ready because after all she is the baby.

    Answer by LeoneLover13 at 2:44 AM on May. 22, 2009


    Answer by older at 7:40 AM on May. 22, 2009

  • I used the No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizebeth Pantley but my son was closer to 2 and even then it was because I was VERY pregnant and worried about nursing two babies at night. I would have let him do it but I think he was ready, I wouldn't have pushed him. It took less than a week and no tears. But at 12 months I was still rocking my babies. There is nothing wrong with it.

    Yay for your husband! CIO isn't a very nice thing to do to a baby,

    Answer by Pauline3283 at 11:10 AM on May. 22, 2009