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Up and then Down?????

What do u do when ur having sex with ur hubby and he is fully erect in the begining and then he just goes down and can't get back up? This has never happened before we had sex the night before and there was no problem. He's very upset that it happened he tells me its not me but i cant help to think it is. Could it be he's bored? Could it be my weight? Im not big at all i only weight 145 im scared he doesn't want me anymore any suggestions? We have no problems that i am aware of. Im i just being paranoid hes in his 40's in my early 30's.

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:27 AM on May. 22, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • If he's in his 40's then he is waaaaaaay past his sexual peak in life. It's not you, he just might not have the stamina he used to. I know that's hard not to take personally, but try not to freak out! If it keeps happening, he might want to talk to a doc.

    Answer by ajguinn at 8:33 AM on May. 22, 2009

  • Was he drinking? Or doing any drugs? I am NOT a common drug user but one night my husband & i ran into an old friend who had some speed. We were stupid & thought it would be fun. Anyway, later that night. Same thing, it just went straight down. Was hard as a rock one second, then it just shriveled up. We blamed it on the substances. He has also been very drunk before & not been able to get it up.

    He could also be going through something psychological, or emotional. OR it could be that erectiel dysfunction is beginning. If he, or you is at all worried about it, go see a Dr.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:49 AM on May. 22, 2009

  • No he is not on any drugs he does have ashma and he takes supplements for his weight lifting but they r steriods or anything like that. He did used to be on anti depressents yrs ago like 25yrs ago that effected his sex drive too big time he told me that when we first got together and he doesn't drink. He was very distraught this morning, i didnt make him feel bad at all i just told him we can try again another time. His manhood is damaged big time he couldn't look me in the face hardly this morning. We tell each other everything but i know he is very embarassed about it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:02 AM on May. 22, 2009

  • Try mixing things up a bit. He could be bored and not even know it. Try some different positions maybe that might help. I knjow drinking can cause problems with that. Thats why i dont let my SO drink vodka lol. Im sure its not that he just isnt into you. But at his age it could be that hes just having some trouble and might need a little help with a little blue pill. Guys dont like to admit that they are having trouble with getting it up or keeping it there. Its a major blow to their ego but try to make him feel like what happend isnt a big deal. That might make him feel more comfortable with trying agian soon.

    Answer by Shelii at 10:07 AM on May. 22, 2009

  • Can he have diabetes you know .My husband has diabetes and he is controling it but it does affect your sex life.Could it be he is stressed at his job or maybe it was a one time thing.Think about itNo all these woman are talking about drinking and drugs .She did not mention that and not once someone thought to say it could be a medical condtiion.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:27 AM on May. 22, 2009

  • its ok it happens to everyone he could be under a lot of stress and he doesnt want you to know about it stress can make that happen a lot even anti depressants can do it to if he took them for a long time it could be that too. if hes bored then try new stuff mabey something kinky or surprise him or try a new nighty or a nice romantic dinner stress can do that and it sucks but its happend to me before too and i felt bad and my bf felt bad tooo. but a week later he was less stressed and we were good!!! you can also go to doctor and see what the doctor says there are some stamina pills that men can take at a gas station but dont take it if he is bigger or if his heart easily races cuz it will get you going but he will be hard all day and all night long!!!! and they arent that much either they are little blue pills that say stamina!!! hopee i helped a bit it will get better just try new things and make sure hes not stressing

    Answer by Tbaby61727 at 10:39 AM on May. 22, 2009

  • Yes he is stressed at his job but for about 12yrs now he has not been able to do it two times in a row in one setting...its frustrating for me cause he doesn't want to try new things cause he has done everything already and i feel im gettin cheated. I love him very much but he needs to try and compromise with me, i want car sex, i want adventurous sex but he not as willing anymore cause he claims hes to old. I'll mention that about the diabetes he doesn't have it but he may need to get checked thank you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:40 AM on May. 22, 2009

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