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Can young people be good parents too?

I know this topic has been hashed out many times before, but I ask because my dh and I started out having kids really young and we recieved rude comments then and continue to do so, even though we are now older. We have 2 kids that are 12 and 13 and we are both 29 now. We aren't perfect of course, but I think we have done a good job so far. Some other parents that are much older than us with kids the same ages are always making rude snide remarks about us being young and having teenagers, and that we probably have no idea what we are doing. Argghh drives us nuts!

What is your opinion on younger parents of older kids and teens? If you are a young parent, do you get rude comments too? How do you handle them?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:55 PM on May. 22, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (27)
  • The worst parents I have seen don't seem to be the young ones. I think that because of the pressure to be a good parent and all of the surrounding criticism it pushes them into being better parents than most. In this country a women who becomes pregnant has a few choices on how to handle the situation. Women and men who make the choice to become parents despite their age should be praised especially since they have a tough road ahead supporting their child both financially and mentally. It is a real grown up choice and I have seen many of them do great. I think they deserve kudos not criticism. It's a tough job.
    Mrs.Granados

    Answer by Mrs.Granados at 4:44 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • I change the subject. When the question is asked, I answer, "My daughter turned out very beautiful and a perfect lady. You should see her". Then I talk about something unrelated.
    BlueSaphire

    Answer by BlueSaphire at 1:02 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • Age doesn't necessarily make a good parent. I know teens that are better parents than older parents and vice versa. Ignore all the rude comments and be the wonderful parent that you know you are.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 1:02 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • I had my first at 18 2nd at 19 3rd at 21 and 4th a few years later. I left him after 15 yrs. and married a 2nd guy- he wanted his own child, so I now have a baby and my oldest is 23 yrs. The only thing that I dont like is people try to guess my age all the time- its none of their business - because I have a 23 yr. old. They make comments like - how is it to start all over again?? I tell them I love my baby and being a Mom again is a miracle, that I am blessed and I mean it. My older kids love having a new baby around and brag to all their friends, so do not worry what other people say. Its your life - ignore them, when u have grandkids you will have the energy to enjoy them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:03 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • I get rude comments all the time by people on this website, myspace, church, by friends, and even at the grocerie store. All you can do is proove them wrong by being the best parent you can be. Im 19 and pregnant and MOST people I tell have a rude comment about it. I had a lady at my church told me that since I "fornicated" before I was married, my child and I will burn in hell. She even went so far as to send me adoption papers filled out for me to give my baby away! She said that Im so young, I cant take care of a baby. I get asked when Im due and where my wedding ring is and people turn their noses up at me and walk away when I tell them how old I am and that Im not married. I wear my moms wedding ring so that I dont have to deal with it. I know its bad to lie, but if you were getting it from all angles, you would too. The best thing to do is just kill them with kindness or proove them wrong.
    Alysia_Moore

    Answer by Alysia_Moore at 1:04 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • by the way I HATE the word FORNICATION and FORNICATE!
    Alysia_Moore

    Answer by Alysia_Moore at 1:05 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • I think that 15 and 16 year olds shouldnt be having children. They're still kids themselves. However, even with you being that young having a child...if you say you did a good job....forget what other people say. I'm 21 years old and have a 2 1/2 year old son. I look younger than I am and I, too, get comments even right to my face, "Well...you look too young to have a toddler" I smile and say, "Yeah, I'm only 21 but it's ok because I'm doing a great job."

    Nobody is perfect and everyone has a different way of raising their children.
    bailey.

    Answer by bailey. at 1:11 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • i had muh bby at 16, n YES.. i get rude comments all the time. n its always from old ppl. : /
    ud think theyd have more class than that.
    alot of muh family says ill never b a good mom cuz im too young to know what im doin.
    i despise the saying "babies having babies". urgh. why does age have anything to do with parenting other than the maturity level?? n shall i say that i matured very quickly when i found out i was prego. i think it mainly depends on the person.
    one of muh great aunts came up to me at a FUNERAL when i was 7 months pregnant n said "ohh. so ur pregnant??? good luck with THAT!!" i was pissed. but i juss smiled n walked away.
    when ppl ask how old i am or say im too young to be a mother i juss say something like "well, im obviously not too young, cuz i AM a mother."
    they usually shut up after that. : ]
    momma323

    Answer by momma323 at 1:15 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • I think young people -- meaning still in high school -- who get pregnant are extremely stupid and immature. However, that doesn't mean that they won't be great parents. It also means that they just have to grow up a bit faster than most kids. If I see a young couple together with their child or children, I congratulate them for being able to stay together and get through the difficult time that they obviously have had to overcome.


    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:22 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • i think everyones different, i had my son at 18 and i think we are doing pretty darn good and so does everyone i know but it depends on the person and their age obviously i dont think like a 14 year old would do so well but who am i to say that .. when i was in middle school their was a 12 year old who got pregnant she didnt get to keep it though but i think some young people can be great parents just like some can be bad and some older parents can be good or bad!
    masonsmommii

    Answer by masonsmommii at 2:10 PM on May. 22, 2009

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