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13 months and still sleeping with mommy and daddy.

I have a 13 month old who still sleeps with me and my partner. I lived on my own and didnt mind him sleeping with me, but now that we live with daddy our bed is a little crowded. We have our new little one coming in Oct. and it would be nice to have him out of our bed and in his own bed before the baby comes. He doesnt even take naps in his bed.. PLEASE HELP, WHAT DO I DO?

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Asked by JDalila at 6:36 PM on May. 22, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (11)
  • i understand!i have the same son is 23 months and still sleep with us.he have his own bed but he hate also expecting a girl,im 32 weeks, and i will like him to be in his own bed before his sister comes. he dont even like taking naps on his bed!! i dont know what do to either!!

    Answer by dianaNbryanMami at 6:41 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • I can't be of much help... when my firstborn was 12 months and we found out we were expecting our second, we just saved up and got a king size bed. It was so worth it! For us, continuing cosleeping made the transition of adding another child seamless and easy for everyone. If that's not the case for you, I hope you find gentle, positive solutions that make the move easy for everyone. 13 months is a tricky age to force that kind of separation, it's a pretty needy age. Waiting a couple months can make all the difference if it really seems to be traumatic for her - there are windows of development where making changes like that are much easier, and trying to force them when you're not in that window is just rough on everyone.

    I will say unequivocally, do not make the shift in the 2 months before or the 2 months after you give birth - you do not want your toddler blaming the baby and feeling resentful and shoved aside. Make it a

    Answer by Collinsky at 6:49 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • ...sorry! Make it a totally separate thing, not associated with the baby at all.

    Answer by Collinsky at 6:49 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • start now putting him in his own bed. just keep putting him to bed every time he gets up he will fall asleep and learn from this mistake and don't let the next one sleep with you. at least have them in their own bed in your room if you want them near.

    Answer by Lyndall at 6:51 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • Our daughter was 5 before she finally started sleeping in her own bed on her own free will...Her brother, our son, is now 3 years old and he may fall asleep elsewhere but he will always end up in the middle of our bed! As frustrating as it may be, this seems to be a part of growing up nowadays. We as parents have let loose the reins a bit and now have to suffer the consequences. TTFN

    Answer by rune2319 at 6:57 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • I'm sorry, but allowing your child to sleep in your bed isn't a mistake. You can transition them anytime you want. So, you haven't made a horrible parenting faux pas. We had ours in our bed until we didn't want her there anymore. Then, we transitioned her. No big deal.

    What we did was get her a big bed, a double, and put it on the floor. My husband slept with her for a week to get her used to it. Now, she sleeps alone all night.

    Answer by apexmommy at 7:13 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • to start off i dont think its a bad thing he is still in the bed.. cuz these are going to be the days that will be missed but this is what i did and it tuck me about 4 days and my frined a week.. but still worked.. every time its time for a dp change do it in his room and only his room, and the same gose for geting him dress.. play in the room spend a lot of time in the room.. now here comes the hard part.. let him take his nap in your room.. thats like a lil treat to him.. ok night 1 get ready to stay up most the night.. lay him down and just let him cry and i know girl its going to be hard but dont give in cuz then u will have to start all over... anywho.. let him cry for a lil.. about a good 20min.. then go in ther and let him know your still around lay him back down if hes up. dont spend to much time in ther... keep doing this as long as it take.. but dont give in.. then on day 2 do the same thing..

    Answer by kaseysmom_07 at 10:09 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • and by day 3 the time u go in ther will be shorter and shorter .. but dont give in and thats the hard part seeing them cry.. i have had a lot of moms try this and it works.. by day 4 and 5 let him take his naps in ther...

    Answer by kaseysmom_07 at 10:11 PM on May. 22, 2009

  • My son moved out of our bed when he was 25 months old but he just went right next to our bed in his crib. At nap time we sleep togeather in my bed while daddys at work and then at night my husband sleeps on the couch while I put my son to sleep in our bed and then I trasfer him to his bed. He sleeps through the whole night but wakes up about 7 or 8 am and wants warm milk and then goes back to bed for about an hr and a half. My husband and I are trying for another baby and I have no idea how were going to fit every one in the room but we will make it happen because even though my son has his own room I dont want him to ever feel left out when the other baby is here and plus I feel safe knowing that hes right next to me. I always think about what if theres a fire or if someone breaks in, I want my baby as close as possible but thats just me.Sorry I wasnt much of help but maybe just work him gradually in his room. GL and congrats

    Answer by LANDENSMOMMYlmk at 12:36 AM on May. 23, 2009

  • I also think it's cruel to allow your baby to sleep warm and protected in your bed, then suddenly dump them in another and let them cry themselves to sleep. Help him for a week or so. Our two year old did get upset during the transition, but my husband was laying down with her, helping her learn that her new bed was safe, too.

    Answer by apexmommy at 7:43 AM on May. 23, 2009

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