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Need advice with lazy husband

Okay Im 35 weeks pregnant I have an 18 month old daughter and a 7 year old son. I go to school in the morning (36 hours a week) I take my daughter to day care because my husband is to lazy to get up in the morning and take care of her, then I take my son to school. My husband works about 20 - 35 hours a week and is off by 11:30pm the lastest.. when hes not at work he is at his friends house or playing his Xbox with his headphones on.. He will stay out untill 4:30am.. Im doing everything, takeing care of the kids, house, bills, errands while my husband does whatever he wants when ever he wants.. His parents help me out more then he does, I cant even get him to watch the kids so I can do home work... And my 7 yr old, just wants to do something with him but cant get his attention because he is on his game.. any one got advice on what I should do??

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Asked by lovingmommaof3 at 1:27 AM on May. 24, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Yeah hide the xbox from him and when he goes looking for it tell him fine but we need to talk first and tell him how you feel

    Answer by hautemama83 at 1:45 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • Don't hide the Xbox, that's childish. Just tell him that you need to talk. Make a time where both of you can sit down and discuss things without interruptions (or at least minimal interruptions). Tell him what you told us and make a compromise with him. Good Luck!


    Answer by JeremysMom at 1:50 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • See thats the thing.. Ive had the talk with him, his parents have had the talk with him but nothing changes... We communicate so well.. but when it comes to this and money.. He does what he wants.. If I took that xbox that just make it worse. I dont know.. lol I guess thats why I am asking other moms.. hoping maybe someone has a problem like mine and Im not alone.

    Answer by lovingmommaof3 at 2:05 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • if you are on campus 36 hours a week and the kids are in day care and school you can do your homework on campus. He's not going to help. He didn't turn into this creature from the lazy lagoon overnight. Do what you've always done and ignore him and work around him. He must do something worth staying for. You are an educated woman. You have choices. make them.

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:19 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • Maybe you two can get counseling. I would write a letter to him telling him how I feel & what I need him to do, since how you tried talking.
    Also I wouldn't sleep in the same room as him until he listened to you.
    Talk to his friends & ask them not to come over for awhile so you two can work this out.
    Things will get worst before they get better. If he doesn't listen, won't go for counseling, and the sleeping in different rooms don't work.. He needs awake up call separate from him so He can know what he is missing & hopefully he will grow up a little.

    Answer by maiahlynn at 5:47 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • Yeah, stop everything that you do for him(clothes, food, errands, etc). Do only for you and your children and let him see what he has in you

    Answer by Kat122 at 6:25 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • You already said it. "I do everything" so why do you keep the dead weight around. If he is good for something, then keep him. If he is in the way, boot him to the curb, the courts will make sure he makes time for the kids, and pays for them too. You may be better off !

    Answer by ally418 at 2:48 PM on May. 24, 2009

  • I think it is time to sit him down and tell him how stressed this is making you and he needs to stop being a lazy bum and be a husband/father! I would also see if his parents can talk to him again too- and stress him needing to grow up. I really think marriage counseling would be a good idea. As for homework- do you have time to work on that at school or the library? Someplace quiet where you won't be disturbed or distracted. If he can't be bothered to parent the kids or do anything for you, then I would stop doing anything for him. Don't cook for him, wash his clothes, clean up after him..... let him stew in his own mess. Just take care of your kids and your needs, wash you/kids clothes.... He needs to be a partner/father not another dependent for you to take care of. I hope all works out!!

    Answer by MizLee at 4:55 PM on May. 24, 2009

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