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How do I gently let my beautiful 13 yr old daughter know that she - although the sweetest , most compaasionate child in the world can sometimes be giving people what I call "the evil eye"without knowing- she is sooooooo sensitive- trust me she gets discipline - but this is different.-----??

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:05 AM on May. 24, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (6)
  • The evil eye? Is she casting curses and black magic? Sorry, I just don't understand the question.

    Answer by rkoloms at 9:46 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • My mother says, your teenage daughter is well aware she is giving whomever the "evil eye." Somewhere along the line, we forgot what it was like to be a teenager. Though the times were different, and things were different, that tumultuous pass from childhood, to being a teenager, to finally becoming an adult, is fraught with evil eyes, mean muggings, hysterical tears, defiance, anger and passion. And that's all in one day. Get over yourself, she's a kid, and by that very definition, strange, strange, strange.

    Answer by Wonder_Mommie at 2:53 PM on May. 24, 2009

  • I was never aware of my facial expressions. I am barely aware of other people's. People used to tell me all the time to "smile" or "be in a good mood." If I said I was in a good mood or perfectly content/happy or whatever, they would insist I was not, repeatedly, because of this expression crap that I could not relate to and did not understand. In fact, they would usually insist until I was beyond angry and wanted to smack them. And then there was the "smile" issue -- I would try, then I would get bitched at that they mean a real smile, and no smile I could ever attempt was ever a proper or good enough one. So as it turned out, I have autism. I'm not saying your daughter is on the spectrum at all, but she may just not be an overly expressive person with her face. Nagging her and making her self-conscious about it at this age will only cause long-term issues, in my opinion.

    Answer by roachiesmom at 6:42 PM on May. 24, 2009

  • Stupid word limit. My suggestion is that when you notice her doing this, see if you can discretely pull her over and ask her about what she is feeling/thinking at the moment. It could be something about the person, subconsciously or otherwise, or it could be some random, shiny object thought that crossed her mind, completely unrelated to the person or conversation, or any number of things. Maybe set up a signal you can flash at her so she can pull herself back to attention and take note of her surroundings and thoughts to become aware of it or something. Something, anything, other than badgering her incessantly about the way she may happen to look at people, or making a huge public spectacle out of any expression that does not meet the criteria of other people (not saying you do that to her, just an in-general type thing.) Good luck to her.

    Answer by roachiesmom at 6:52 PM on May. 24, 2009

  • oh, this one cracks me up! my 13 yr. old has a really good friend that does the same thing...

    don't worry about it. life is too short! just tell her your feelings and if it really bothers you that much, keep reminding her. she'll get the hint after about 100 times or so. remember she's young and her hormones are outta wack. lol! Think of it this way----No one will mess with her!

    Answer by tortcm at 10:20 AM on May. 25, 2009

  • Take a picture of it and show it to her. She probably has absolutely no idea she holds her face that way.

    Answer by LindaClement at 3:14 PM on May. 27, 2009

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